NoPoGirl

If you write it on the board, does that make it true?

2011-12-13T11:01:00.000-08:00

My coach is a funny man. And by funny, I don't mean HA HA, that guy is HILARIOUS! funny.

I mean BAT SHIT CRAZY funny.

And I'm not just saying this because he regularly kicks my ass. He really, truly is BAT SHIT CRAZY. Here are some examples: when I describe an epic powder day on the mountain, he just looks at me blankly. He regularly rides his computrainer indoors for over 100 miles and considers it an "average day". He thinks that time trials are fun.

This is how he began December: "Look here, gang. I've got a really big, almost unachievable goal for 2012. I want you to come up with something similarly impossible and make THAT your goal."

I won't go in to the logistics of his goal, because that's his business, but...

WHO THE HELL MAKES SOMETHING IMPOSSIBLE THEIR GOAL?!

I wanted to say back, "Look here, COACH. I have these things called LIFE RESPONSIBILITIES. Like, you know, my jobby job and my kid and her upbringing and, oh I don't know, spending time with my husband every once in a while."

I didn't say any of that because I am a big, fat wuss. I just put my head down and continued pedaling to nowhere on that damn computrainer. I tried to avoid talking about it as long as I could.

The problem when you show up to regular workouts and the workout involves pedaling to nowhere? You can't escape.

So now I have this ridiculous goal (which, NO, I am not going to share with you because that's my business and the 50 other people who train with our group) and CRAP.

Crap, you guys. I don't have time for this. I don't have the fortitude for this. I don't have the experience for this.

Just...CRAP.

Everyone had to write their 2012 goal on the white board. Now it stares at me every time I ride my bike to nowhere. And every single time, there is one less "don't, can't, won't" in my brain and one more "I am ALL OVER THAT" in my brain.

DAMN, I HATE THAT GUY.

DAMN.

Ski season '11/'12

2011-11-20T09:46:00.001-08:00

Started in a seriously awesome way. 18 degrees, FEET of powder and perfectly blue skies.
Bring it.

Injured reserve

2011-11-01T18:53:00.000-07:00

Let's see. How did this all begin?

Oh right. I know. I went running. And it hurt. I thought it was a fluke, so I went running again. It hurt more.

I took a little bit of time off. And then tried running a third time. It hurt even worse and I finally got it through my head that there might be a problem (I am just a tad bit stubborn).

So, between the doctor and the acupuncturist and the podiatrist and my coach, the problem boiled down to this: I have been running on really crappy, really old orthotics and now I have a nice amount of soft tissue damage in my lower shins. It's quite boring actually and people's eyes tend to glaze over when I start to explain what the hell is wrong with me and why the hell I am not racing.

They want to hear about blood and gore and traumatic crashes and all I have to offer is this: I am an idiot who should have had new orthotics and new shoes eons ago.

Initally, the doctor cleared me to bike race but not to run. I raced. I did not get better. That's when the hammer came down: no racing OR I will not have a ski season OR I will be wearing a boot on both feet OR zombies might attack the world OR the world will spontaneously combust.

You know, any or all of the above.

So I gulped hard, held back my disappointment and nodded my head when my doctor asked if I would comply.

It's been over a month of no racing and over six weeks of no running. I am still not better and therefore not cleared to head out to the trails, forget running two steps carrying a bike over my shoulder.

This injury thing is super annoying. Forget the 30-minute workout. You know, the workout you do when you only have 1/2 an hour between work and picking up the kid at daycare? Yeah, that's gone because that was a quick run. Also, cyclocross skills practice? Adiós, amigo. Track workout? Say hello to my new friend, Masters Swim Practice (also known as "Oxygen Deprivation at Ridiculously Early Morning Hours").

Then, to add insult to a real-life injury, I woke up on Monday morning unable to move my neck. At all. I thought it was a typical I-slept-weird-now-I-have-this-stupid-kink-in-my-neck-to-make-me-cranky-all-day kind of thing. But of course, it wasn't. It's now been almost 48 hours of excruciating "PLEASE GIVE ME SOME PAINKILLERS" kind of pain and after some chiropractic, massage, acupuncture, ice, stretching and kinesio tape, I can only hope that it's better tomorrow. And pop some more painkillers.

(Yeah, seriously, I know. WTF??)

Being injured isn't all negative. I am turning in to super cyclocross supporter. I am more rested than I have been in months. I am posting some pretty damn good power numbers on the computrainer.

Yes, I am still allowed to ride my bike. Just no running. At all. Period. For real this time, NoPoGirl.

Anyway.

I still check the race results religiously. I still secretly plot disobeying the doctor and racing the next weekend. I still stare at my trail running shoes longingly.

Things I tell myself: There will be another cyclocross season. I will ski hard this winter. I will be even stronger on the bike for road season.

RIGHT???

Just call me Super Race Heckler

In the interim: Spooked

2011-10-23T21:58:00.000-07:00

It's dark around here these days. Really dark. And as any veteran Northwesterner knows, it's not going to get better any time soon.

If you ride a bike or run or or do just about anything outside AND you have a kid and a husband and a job and about 5 million other commitments, you have two options: grit your teeth and continue your activities in the dark or move it all indoors to the gym, with its access to cable and fake lights and machines.

Lately, I have been choosing the darker side of things, mainly because I can't seem to motivate myself to sit on my bike trainer and sweat buckets in front of Jersey Shore. Even the rain seems better than that.

The dark is usually cool with me. By nature, I am not a scaredy-cat. I attribute this to several things: My mom was the antithesis of the freaking-out-OCD-Mom. With four kids, being scared of everything just isn't sustainable. I have many years of experience in the outdoors and I am a ski patroller, where one must be prepared for the possibility of something going wrong at any time. Lastly, I am a middle school teacher. One cannot freak out constantly and successfully teach middle school. At least not anyone who wants to maintain any sense of sanity.

Some years ago, when I was training for half-ironman triathlons, I routinely did my long trail runs in Forest Park in the dark, protected only by my headlamp and my Labrador Retriever. While it justifiably scared the bejeezus out of my husband (and yes, even my mom), I barely gave those nights on the trail a second thought.

Many years later, I feel the same way about my current forays in to the dripping, pitch-black forest on my cyclocross bike. A good 99% of the time, I am more focused on getting home in time to make it to work or to make dinner than I am on safety. Besides, what kind of deranged pervert would hang out in a sopping wet and cold forest to take down girls on cyclocross bikes? That would be some kind of deranged pervert idiot and I am pretty sure I can outride one of those.

But tonight? Tonight, as I climbed Saltzman, I let my mind wander and then it decided to play tricks. Lots of tricks. Within a minute, I imagined people jumping from behind every towering tree (and there are a lot of trees in Forest Park), wielding knives or machetes or worse. I plotted my escape, which would involve a 180 degree turn back downhill and wondered if I could make the turn in time. The gravel beneath my tires crunched and I was sure someone was on my tail. I could barely breathe without doing a scan in to the forest with my headlight to make sure no one was there.

Stupid, I know. But once your mind runs away, there's not much you can do to catch it, other than safely arriving at your own front door.

When I showed up at the intersection with Leif Erickson, I didn't think twice: I turned right. Instead of continuing my hill climb, I chose the safe route- towards home (albeit 8 dark, obscure miles away). And I didn't feel even a tiny bit bad about it. I don't really think I have much intuition about these kinds of things, but I knew that if I kept going, I would be so afraid, my workout would suffer tremendously.

On the way home, I shook my first at the park. Score one for the rainforest and zero for NoPoGirl.

But I cannot let it remain this way. It might just be the right time to apply for my concealed handgun permit.

Which I think might scare the bejeezus out of Barkernews. So maybe not. Maybe I just need to suck it up and get out of my own head.

Cyclocross 2011

2011-09-13T22:58:00.000-07:00

I started off the cyclocross season by not racing. That's right. I didn't race. I just watched Barkernews kick ass and I worked on being a Cat A cheerleader.

I am a pretty rad cheerleader when I don't have to worry about racing later in the day. In fact, I am probably one of the best. How do I know this?

After the race, a couple guys came up to me and thanked me profusely for motivating them to work harder.

See? I rock.

So, why didn't I race? Well, cheering is exhausting. For real. It's a JOB. Second, Barkernews had to work at noon. And lastly, I just didn't want to. It had only been two weeks since Eugene and I was tired. I didn't have the bug to race, even though Pain 'n Sufferin' on the Peak is usually a good race for me.

As I am learning, if you don't have the bug to race AND you feel tired, it's best to lay low. Besides, I can put that $25 towards a massage anyway, right?

That said, I was *slightly* more motivated to race after cheering on Barkernews. I think this cyclocross season will be a fun one.

Demonstrating what pain and suffering look like.

Barkernews: Oh god, I might die. Hazel: Do you want to play with me now, Daddy?

Celebrating Labor

2011-09-08T22:52:00.000-07:00

See you later. We're going to find ice cream and we're not coming back!

The Barkers celebrated Labor Day in our usual fashion: at Mom and Dad's cabin. It was sunny and hot and we spent our time celebrating Clayon's final graduation from college, kayaking, jet-skiing, riding bikes, and playing sardines with our constantly growing family in a small cabin.

It was wonderful. For some kid images, you can check out Hazel's blog.

Just know this: we love it there. We love being with the entire Kaiser clan and we love being in the desert, on the Columbia River.

That is all you need to know.

Redemption...not so much

2011-09-01T22:33:00.000-07:00

Winner, winner, chicken dinner! Janet KILLED her competition!

After my disappointing finish at the High Desert Omnium, I THOUGHT going out to the Eugene Celebration Stage Race to redeem myself would be a good idea.

I was wrong.

It went like this: I went on vacation for two weeks, during which I rested and slept and relaxed, but barely rode my bike. Then, I came home, and my coach immediately made me ride a bunch of hills. During those rides, my heart rate skyrocketed to 9000 beats per minute and I was barely faster than a turtle. On a good day. Also? He may or may not have pushed me a few times while going uphill in his aerobars.

Yeah, embarrassing.

There was no way in hell I was going to be doing anything close to "redeeming" at Eugene.

Coach convinced me to do it anyway and consider it training.

Right. Training while eating nothing but Gu and trying to untie my stomach from its continual racing knots for three days.

The good news? Janet, my amazing teammate, handily won the entire race by winning EVERY STAGE. She rocks.

The bad news? Wow, I suffered. I came in 4th overall, thanks only to my time in the road race, but...ouch. Big ouch.

There were two ways to approach my cycling life after this stage race: throw my bike in the trash and forget about this bike racing thing completely or consider myself in much better shape for cyclocross season.

After some days of rest, I chose the latter. And secretly thanked my coach for kicking my ass once again.

But don't tell him that.

Family camping on Lake Cushman

2011-08-22T21:18:00.000-07:00

I swear that I told you about camping with my sister and her husband on Lake Cushman last year, but a detailed search of the blog files reveals that to not be true.

Oops. Sorry. Know this: last year, Haze and I camped with Ailey and Ritchie at Lake Cushman on the Olympic Peninsula. It was cold but fun. Barkernews stayed home since he was on call. That's about the extent of it.

This year, we gathered up some more of the clan: Nate, Marissa, and Baby Eli. Marissa was a never-ever. You guys, she had NEVER EVER been camping before.

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?

It was time to pop her camping cherry.

And so we did. Unfortunately, the campground was loud and crowded and Eli cried a lot at night and my brother made her sleep on an itty bitty thermarest. But she was a trooper and (mostly) smiled and claimed she had a good time.

I know we did. We rode bikes, trail ran, swam in a lake that was down 15 feet and took very few pictures, some of which are below. It was a great weekend.

That said, we are never going back to that campground. It's not very peaceful (which is an understated way of saying IT SUCKED) and the price was not right. Next time? We'll congregate somewhere even prettier, but with less people and more space. Because if Eli cries again at night? I plan to be 5 campsites away. (KIDDING, Nate and Marissa! KIDDING! Well, sort of.)

Fascinating fact: It was the fourth weekend in a row I slept in a tent with my besties. My tent is awesome. Sleeping on the ground when you have the Luxury Basecamp Double Thermarest? Even more awesome.

Takhlakh Lake

2011-08-15T21:05:00.000-07:00

Within approximately 5 seconds of arriving home from vacation, I was all, "Let's go camping again RIGHT NOW!"

Because I really do love camping that much. And I wanted to re-create the bliss I found on our vacation as soon as I possibly could.

I took our camping fate in to my own hands and searched for campsites within 3 hours of here. I found Takhlakh Lake, a place that, surprisingly, we had never heard of, nor visited. We didn't go to Mt. Adams last summer and it was time to go back.

The snow was cleared from the campground literally 2 days prior to our arrival and the mosquitos were EVERWHERE. All of us came home looking like we had a bad case of the chicken pox. I counted 55 bites just on Hazel.

Despite the insane itching that followed, it was a weekend well spent. Barkernews rode his road bike to Trout Lake to get us coffee (a good 45+ mile round trip), I lost myself trail-running, and Hazel tried to steal another little girl's fishing pole.

While it wasn't the same as our 2-week vacation, it was a fantastic nod to family time. See, what it comes down to is this: Barkernews and The Hizz are my two most favorite people in whole wide world. Mosquitos or no mosquitos, I would rather spend my weekend with them in a tent than hundreds of other people in a city.

And, yes, I would like that in my obituary.

Vacation, deux

2011-08-10T20:23:00.000-07:00

For your gift today, I (finally) give you...the second part of our vacation!

Act excited.

After our week of child-free bliss, we picked up the munchkin in Central Washington, where she was living the dream: watching Disney movies, eating fruit loops and staying up late, all thanks to her grandparents.

Our goal was to sweep the child up and get the heck out of Dodge. Destination: Lake Coeur d'Alene.

We didn't make out of there as quickly as we planned. We were sucked in to the allure of a ski boat, blue skies and hot weather. We're so glad we stayed just a little longer.

Once firmly ensconced in our campsite on Lake Coeur d'Alene however (a mere 4 hours of toddler napping away), we promptly checked out the happenings around town.

Best happening around town #1: The 72-mile paved bike path. Our reaction: SHUT. UP. A 72-mile paved bike path? FOR REAL? We partook every. single. day.

Best happening around town #2: The beach on the lake, where we easily spent 5-6 hours every day. Daily schedule? Breakfast, bike to beach, swim, dig in sand, swim, lay in sand, swim, lunch, swim, lay in sand, dig in sand, swim, bike to camp.

Without a doubt, I could do this every day of my life and never grow bored.

Best happening around town #3: Canoeing. Hazel attempts to paddle once or twice, throws her paddle in the water and is then content to just sit there and watch Mommy and Daddy paddle. Or maybe just Daddy, depending on how lazy I feel.

Evidence of the good life. I built that sand castle. Yes, I am a true artist.

On our last day on Lake Coeur d'Alene, Barkernews biked almost to the end of the bike path. Lucky.

Marshmallows in a tutu. Quintessential Barker Family Vacation.

Hazel and I worked REALLY hard on this "swimming pool". It's pretty rad, yeah?

No Disney movies or Fruit Loops here. Just lots of beach, water and down time.

So. Then we weren't done. Because vacation should always include some sort of adventure, we headed north to Priest Lake, where we searched in vain for a campsite. We didn't really find one (it's a long, convoluted story that, trust me, you don't care about).

Barkernews did his due diligence and found a rad "bike-in" location right on the lake instead. I KNEW the past 10 years with him were not a joke!

This is the view from our campsite. Do you understand why I did not want to come home?

Hazel spent the majority of our time on Priest Lake completely naked because, well, WHY NOT?

This picture is really meant to show the clarity of the lake, but it was taken from inside a frosted Tupperware container. Do not be fooled. The visibility in the lake is probably down to 20 feet.

Our "bike-in" campsite required a little mule action. We didn't mind. Where else can you camp mere feet from the water and have your own personal beach?

After 4 days on Lake Coeur d'Alene and 4 days on Priest Lake, we went home.

And I was very, very sad. Two weeks of pure family time and complete technology blackout had induced a state of nirvana in me. I haven't felt that relaxed in a year- since our last vacation as a nuclear family.

I didn't worry about work or training or (not) cleaning my house (in fact, I scheduled my house cleaner to come while we were gone. Best. Decision. Ever.). We didn't operate on anyone's schedule except our own. At some point, I stopped looking at my watch because, really? I would wake up when I woke up. Who cares what time it is?

I think the deep state of content we reached as a family is only possible on a vacation of a week or more. Given our chaotic day-to-day lives, it takes a few days just to start to decompress. I can't imagine not having our time together each summer.

We are so blessed-to have each other, to have the time to spend together just us, to have such beautiful places to visit.

I love my family.

Vacation: first verse

2011-08-08T21:48:00.000-07:00

We were going to go to Europe for our ten-year anniversary. Then the government took all of our money and killed that dream. Thanks, government!

It's almost enough to make me a Republican.

Okay, not really. I'll just think of Europe wistfully and remember all the conservative, Tea Party-backed politicians' families I helped feed.

*sigh*

So. Where does one go if one cannot afford to go to Europe? Well, one goes to the "American Alps". That's "North Cascades" to you. And, if it's one's 10th anniversary? Well, one drops the kid off at Grandma and Grandpa's, tries not to giggle too much and goes straight to a super cute cabin in the woods.

That's what we did. Three years of parenthood and we haven't spent an entire week together, sans child. We have spent weekends and half-weeks, but there's something about a whole week. Time feels different. Everything feels different...and easy. Wow, is it easy to go on vacation without a kid (though we did that too- that's the second verse). At some point in the week, you look at your spouse and you smile and you think, "I am so damn glad I married this person and I get to spend this time with him (or her, as the case may be)."

After the intensity of my school year and my racing season, I was beyond ready for a vacation. I would have gone to Beaverton, as long as it meant a complete lack of responsibility or expectation for a full week. I wanted to turn all of the technology off (we are strongly committed to "technology blackout" during family vacations), turn my brain off and just...breathe.

And so I did. And it was glorious. I think I am still a little high from the experience.

Without further ado, here is a very choice selection of pictures from our first week of vacation. A short anthology of the second week will arrive soon. I promise.

Can you see me already breathing a little more deeply?

(overlooking Diablo Lake on the way to Mazama)

So psyched to be kid-free for a week!

On our first full day in the Methow Valley, it rained. All day. After the year we have had here in Portland, I came very close to real tears. But, I took a deep breath, swallowed my disappointment, and we made alternate plans: drive around some random forest roads (and get a little lost) and go trail running. Done and done. Then I read an entire book. It was a good day.

The next day, my best friend, THE SUN, came out and we resumed our adventures. First adventure: riding from Mazama to Washington Pass on the North Cascades Highway. Elevation gain: 3500ft. in 17 miles. The flip side of that? 17 miles of downhill! Woot!

Up the switchbacks. Smiling because I am not racing.

Barkernews, the king of Washington Pass.

After a bike ride, a gratuitous lunch and a gratuitous nap, we looked at each other and wondered: what should we do now?

I know! Rock climbing! So we did.

Really freaking happy to be on the rock again

(Fun Rock, Mazama)

Returning to my roots. You know I was a rock climber before I was a cyclist/runner/triathlete/telemark skier, right?

The day prior, we had begun a daily ritual of visiting the hot tub as many times in one day as we could stand. After our cycling/rock climbing day, we of course visited the hot tub again. It was already the Best Vacation Ever.

So, prepare yourself, you guys. Because every day was JUST AS COOL as that day. I will prove it to you. Read on.

The next morning, we made a quick decision to float the Methow River on inflatable kayaks in the afternoon. Since we woke up when we felt like it, that left us with a some time for a mini-adventure, this time on a hike to Blue Lake.

It's a short hike, with some elevation gain and lots of snowfields. Worth it.

We have no pictures of our amazing float down the Methow River because HELLO?! Who takes their very expensive camera down a river?? Know this: it was rad. And relaxing. And gorgeous.

And then we went back to our cabin in the woods and partook in this:

Cabins in the woods= THE SHIZNIT

Right out of Mazama begins the highest road in Washington state. It leads to Hart's Pass and the Pacific Crest Trail. The views are overwhelming. It is a Must Go. On the 28th, my birthday and our anniversary, we did.

A small sampler of what you see FROM THE ROAD.

Threatening Barkernews with a snowball on the PCT. Lots of snowfields covering the trail, but we still got a good 8 miles in.

TEN YEARS, People!! Every day I wake up next to this guy? I win.

It was pretty hard to wipe the smile off my face all week long.

How does one celebrate the momentous occasion of a ten-year anniversary? Well, I'm glad you asked. By having dinner in a tipi, of course. I mean, DUH. And let's not forget renewing one's vows with a local cowboy/Native American/internet-certified minister.

Renewing our vows at sunset outside Winthrop. Pretty much as rad as our wedding.

This is what dinner in a tipi looks like. In case you were wondering.

Tipi. Mountains. I NEED TO LIVE HERE.

Then? There was STILL MORE RADNESS TO BE FOUND! I know, you can't believe it. Neither could I.

Despite loading our trucks with 4 million bikes, we did not bring our mountain bikes. We swallowed our pride and rented, only to fall in love with the Buck Mountain Trail. Thirteen miles of singletrack love, with views that stretch in to Canada. Dear Barkernews: I would like a new mountain bike for my next birthday, m'kay?

Buck Mountain Love.

No mountain bike day is complete without a dip in Patterson Lake.

The last day of our vacation ended like this- towing our truck to Wenatchee. Some sort of steering issue (I don't even pretend to understand) rendered us handicapped and spending 100 miles of open road in a tow truck, watching the driver down day-old 7/11 fried food and take cigarette breaks.

But you know what? I didn't care. Vacation had gotten in to my blood. Even if I tried, I couldn't be stressed. Good thing I still had another week left.

Reflecting on the awesomeness that is my life.

Pretty close to...DONE

2011-07-17T21:38:00.000-07:00

After the Omnium last weekend, I was feeling the need for some redemption. The problem was that my legs didn't necessarily agree. They wanted to rest. The other problem? Disagreeing opinions between my coach, my husband, and my friends. To race or not to race?

Oh, what the hell. Racing it is.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. On my second lap around that cursed volcano, I pulled out and accomplished my first DNF of the season. I just...couldn't...do...it. I was pedaling squares and falling back on the uphills. My heart rate was ridiculous and I knew. It was time to call it quits.

So I did. And I was not unhappy about it. Lots of great friends with great foods were at Tabor that evening and the Barkers spent the night living it up at the park. That made it all worth it.

The next night, I relaxed by hanging out at Kruger's concert and picnic with my besties, including one who insisted on wearing a tutu on the farm.

I then spent all day Friday taking care of myself. I went to yoga (OW!). I saw my chiropracter, who put e-stem on my legs and gave a me a good massage in addition to adjusting my back and I had a super intense session of acupuncture. I then sat in the hot tub and went to book club.

I felt like a completely new woman, albeit a completely stoned new woman. Acupuncture will do that to you.

Saturday came and with it, the Ironclad Crit. Barkernews' team was sponsoring the race. Therefore, I decided to race, with no expectations. I wanted to support Ironclad, so I said what the hell and handed over my $25. I didn't even care if I came in last.

I didn't come in last. But holy heck, that was a hard crit. Three masters Cat 3 racers showed up to duke it out with the cat 4s and they took off like bullets from the start. Like an idiot, I couldn't clip in to my pedals for the first 1/2 block and I had to go 150% just to catch up. There was no recovery for the next 20 minutes until Alex from Ironclad and I ended watching those silly cat 3s ride away. We traded pulls every lap, doing the best we could to catch the leaders, but in the end, we sprinted it out for 2nd and 3rd in the cat 4s.

She won. :)

I was still happy. For not planning on racing, I think 3rd place is okay. And, I got some great practice racing with the 3s for my imminent upgrade.

With that, I am out of the racing scene until late August, when I may or may not race the Eugene Celebration stage race. Next week brings two weeks of vacation followed by weekends of camping with my besties. To be honest, I am ready. My legs and my brain are tired and could use a little less Gu and a lot more rest.

High Desert Omnium 2011: I want a do-over!

2011-07-11T21:24:00.000-07:00

Way back at the beginning of the year, I identified the High Desert Omnium as my "A" race. I didn't want to just go do it- I wanted to WIN it. After a season of intense training, I knew it was possible as long as I played my cards right.

I won't keep you in suspense. I didn't play my cards right. I didn't win. (insert BIG FAT SIGH)

The worst part of it all? I knew I could have won, had I been more strategic. That's the worst part. It wasn't about fitness or strength. I just wasn't smart enough.

That's bike racing for you. You can be ten times stronger than every other competitor out there (which I am not) but if you don't strategize well, it doesn't matter. My results were close, but not close enough- 3rd in the crit, 5th in the time trial, 4th in the road race. All of that equaled a third overall for the whole omnium.

The other part of bike racing is learning to work with your teammates and I will say that we are definitely working on it. The best part of the weekend was spending time with friends and learning, learning, learning.

I won't go in to the minutiae of every race over the weekend, but I will say this: it was sunny and beautiful and it was in Bend. That alone made it worth it.

Sunset from the Rocking A:

What our 2-year-old daughters do while we're bike racing:

It is not recommended to punch your coach before a race starts:

Pre-race nerves. Yikes.

How Barkernews feels about bike racing:

Hot! Sun! Fireworks! Parades!

2011-07-05T20:28:00.000-07:00

As we have for several previous years, we escaped to my parents' cabin in Sunlands for parades galore, pool time, river time and, of course, fireworks. I managed to bring two bikes and a pair of running shoes, in hopes that I would actually do something active and try to work off the pounds of red meat I ate all weekend.

HA HA HA HA HA HA!

That was me laughing, because I rode my cruiser once, for a grand total of 3 miles, and I didn't take my road bike off of the car.

Did I care? NOT. AT. ALL. That's because Fourth of July in Sunlands isn't about training. It's about Sun! and Fireworks! and Parades! In short, it epitomizes summer.

I should be completely truthful here, though, and tell you that I did run in the Sunlands Inaugural 5k, in which I came in second on a hot and windy day. But then I didn't do anything else active. I swear!

My parents' cabin is about 5 houses down from the pool, but Hazel insists on riding in the wagon every single time.

Check out who is on the jetski! My water-loving baby girl, that's who.

Second woman in the 5K. I wanted to win, but since I now embrace the number "2", I will accept and own it.

En route to the Sunlands kiddie parade. Hazel gives Baby Eli instructions since he's a rookie.

Three days before his first birthday, we celebrated Baby Eli and his awesome cuteness.

Parade Number Two! All geared up for the George, WA parade, featuring antique tractors and a combine.

Hazel's gazillionth piece of candy at the George, WA Fourth of July celebration.

My brother Clayton is a pretty damn rad banjo player. Hire him for your next party! He needs the money!

Bike racing, bike racing, and more bike racing

2011-06-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

Hey! Guess what! I've been racing my bike!

Weird, I know, but it does explain at least a little about why I haven't updated my blog much lately.

I decided to finish June off with a bang and instead of going to Sunriver and racing in the Pacific Crest triathlon like I always do, I thought it would so much more fun to stay home and do three bike races in a weekend.

Sort of. Turns out that Barkernews was on call that weekend and my coach thought it would be super fun to do three bike races in a weekend. Also, we were on the hook for watching Baby Eli for three nights.

Yep. Fun times.

Also known as Oh God My Legs Are Going to Fall Off Times. And dear god, Can I Please Just Go To Bed Times.

I have no pictures of myself racing the time trial, the insanely difficult 8-corner criterium or the fast and furious circuit race. Here's what I do have: two pics of me racing Mt. Tabor the week before.

Where I came in...you guessed it...second.

Le sigh.

However? I'll take my time trial pr, my 4th place crit and my 3rd place circuit finishes with pride. Lots and lots of pride.

Trying to intimidate Kandra. It's not working. :)

Going for...second. Damn the number 2.

My little bro is all growed up

2011-06-13T21:57:00.000-07:00

Twenty-two years ago, I had a little bit of a freak-out due to the knowledge that I was getting yet another sibling. And, it's true that when he arrived, it tilted the balance of our family a little.

But damn, I'm glad he showed up. Someone in this family had to be the comedian. Someone in this family had to be musical and play the banjo at our campfires. Someone in this family had to wear a kilt and aviator glasses on a daily basis.

Yep, he graduated. What Clayton is going to do now, no one really knows. I think Mom and Dad are happy he made it. I'm just happy he's around and he's my brother and I can give him endless grief about his wardrobe and girlfriend choices.

Also, I was ecstatic that it was sunny and 80 degrees on the day he graduated. While Portland sat in a seeping drizzle, I was constantly re-coating myself with sunscreen. HA! Take that, PDX!

We forgot to include Brian and Ritchie in this picture. Ailey was in Liberia. Also, Haze melted and Baby Eli fell asleep. Oh well. No family is perfect.

We did make a concerted effort to take a perfect family picture back at the cabin. Haze was in full-on 2-year-old mode and didn't really want to cooperate.

She was, however, perfectly content to dance with Daddy.

The perfect end to a pretty perfect day which will subsequently be followed the next morning by a perfect bike ride with my husband.
P.S. That bike ride the next day? I got up to 52.9 miles per hour on a downhill. That was super rad.

Second

2011-06-06T10:19:00.000-07:00

In the past two months of racing bikes and triathlon, I have been second three times. Three times, I was close, but not close enough. I was going a little bit insane.

While second is a damn good placing and nothing to be ashamed of, I have been doing this racing thing for a long time. I have spent the vast majority of that time Off The Back, with race goals often consisting of "stay with the group", "finish" and "don't puke".

No more. Those goals are no longer acceptable with me. I want to do well. I want to win some races. And winning does not mean coming in second.

When I laid out my racing season, the Hammer Velo crit didn't even cause a second glance. I have never been particularly good at crits and why would I stay in town (instead of camping) for a 30 minute race?

Due to a combination of exhaustion, planning (or lack thereof) and good weather, I ended up racing it.

And I won.

Yes, you are as surprised as I am.

I didn't do it by myself. I have a coach who, no matter how much I protest, will NOT let me accept defeat, and teammates who gave me great lead-outs.

Oh yeah, and I beat a 22-year-old, just out of college, with no kids. :)

It's a strange feeling, this winning thing. I have spent so much time convincing myself that I am mediocre that I find it difficult to accept that it's even possible that I could have won. I'll admit that I even questioned whether the officials screwed up or I screwed up or, I don't know, SOMETHING, because it just seems so improbable to me.

But here's the truth: I won. Period. I'm going to start believing in that.

All photos below (with the exception of the last one) are from Jose Sandoval, a guru of photo taking who does a spectacular job.

A little crit action:

Ahem. Podium:

Crit spectating is serious business:

Crit winners deserve to go camping in the sunshine. So, we did:

Memorial Day- evidence that the sun still exists

2011-06-02T21:09:00.001-07:00

You know, it's funny. Lately, I have heard from a lot of people who are interested in moving to Portland. My first response, given the lengthy rainy season we have had, is to scream in their face: "ARE YOU CRAZY?! THE WEATHER HERE MAKES YOU WANT TO SCRATCH YOUR EYEBALLS OUT!"

But then I take a deep breath, smile and say, "You know it rains here a little, right?"

Which is such a freaking lie, but at least it's pc.

People, listen up: Portland is in a temperate rainforest AKA Depression Land AKA Vitamin D-starved AKA Can we PLEASE for the love of all that is holy get a couple sunny, hot days up in here? Pretty please? Because if we don't, I might have to take drastic measures. Like moving to Las Vegas, land of sprawl and excess and sin and, oh yeah, SUN.

Anyway. I'm kind of desperate, but that's not too obvious, is it?

Life threw us a bone last weekend in the form of Memorial Day, which was predicted to be predictably rainy and cool in Portland. We got the heck out of Dodge, just like we do on every Memorial Day weekend and escaped to Sunlands where it was indeed sunny and warm.

It was like heaven. We wore short sleeves and basked in the glow. We even went a little crazy and did not wear sunscreen, we were so starved for Vitamin D. When we went home on Monday night, my bones still felt warm. I am not making this up- I felt like I had baked in the oven for 3 days until I was suitably browned and toasted. And oh, did it feel good. In every one of the following pictures, it is sunny. And warm. And also sunny.

I really really really did not want to come home.

My daughter is pretty much the cutest child to have ever lived.

We shot some guns. And then we shot some more guns. Yep.

Barker likes to shoot.

I did a triathlon. It was sunny. I actually sweat. I was hot when I finished. I was pleased.

Right before I find out I'm in second for my age group- AGAIN. I will be 2nd forever it seems.

The poor, poor domestique who had to stand around in the sun all morning.

Okay, fine. I will take this 2nd place medal. But I am only smiling because it's sunny.

Ah, Sunlands. It's a pretty rad place.

My favorites chat about...well, who knows what?

River dirt is better in the sun.

The Season

2011-05-22T20:39:00.000-07:00

Last week, it was sunny two days in a row which was weird and unusual. And so I spent two days riding my cruiser bike nonchalantly around town, wearing flip flops and contemplating the awesomeness of life.

Then I realized: one of the things that makes life awesome is the racing season! And guess what, people? It is the racing season RIGHT NOW.

You know what else? I am pretty freaking stoked about that. Between the pre-race nerves that make me vomit, the continual self-talk and suffering during a race, and the post-race sinking in to the couch from exhaustion and inhaling burritos from ravenous hunger...I love it. I love it all.

So, bring it. Bring it all- the triathlons, the bike races, the 5Ks, the short track mountain biking...BRING. IT. ON.

Balance

2011-05-19T15:20:00.000-07:00

This school year has been the most difficult one for me in recent memory. I would say it ranks right up there with my first year of teaching, except that nothing compares with waking up every day in tears, wondering if you will make it to 3pm. At least THAT didn't happen this year.

My job is emotionally wrenching, aggravating, frustrating, and downright depressing sometimes. It can also be inspiring, hilarious, enlightening and fun. Often, it can be all of those things in one 60-minute period and I never know from one day to the next what it will be. All of that makes it emotionally draining. There were many days this year when I couldn't complete anything after 3pm because I just COULD NOT THINK any more. And, I am slightly embarrassed to admit, there were more than a few days when I went home and sat my daughter down in front of Sesame Street, just so I could have a break.

A lot of people wonder aloud to me how I manage to work, have a family, train and compete, and still fulfill other commitments in my life such as Ski Patrol. My answer is usually that I just happen to be pretty good at time management and scheduling.

But the real answer is bigger than that. All of those things outside of work? They have all basically saved my life at one time or another, most of them multiple times. Work beat me up? Luckily, I have a husband who tells me how wonderful I am on a daily basis (no, you can't have him) and a 2-year-old daughter who never fails to make me laugh or ask for a hug. Feeling like a failure? This year, I have run my fastest mile ever thanks to my coach and I am doing my best to get even faster on the bike. The walls closing in on me? I skied 31 days this year and ripped it up even more than ever.

So, yeah. All of those things have probably kept me out of the mental hospital. Going to a workout at 5am is a pain in the ass for sure, but the numbers to complete are doable and finite. Before my work day even starts, I am successful.

The truth is that I have never achieved the perfect balance and I probably never will. It's an unattainable goal. The see saw is constantly moving back and forth. And each time it tips too far, I know it's time to head back in the other direction.

Really, people, I don't have the answers. I just know that I love my family, I love my job (yes, I really do), I love to train and compete, I love to ski and if I just keep doing those things, it will all work out in the end, right?

See you on the seesaw.

Rain, rain, go away, do not come again EVER.

2011-05-06T12:05:00.000-07:00

We're headed back to the desert tonight, for the fourth weekend in a row, this time to see Barkernews' parents and hang out in a rental house in Bend.

Unfortunately, it looks like we may get skunked, with rain in the forecast. BUZZ KILL.

I have to admit though, I am not TOO upset over the weather forecast. At least in Bend, you can see things. I mean, I like trees as much as the next person, but seriously. They get in the way of the view. And I like views.

Here's hoping the weather holds out long enough for me to get on a mountain bike and to get a trail run in. It would be the perfect trifecta if this cold would go away too. Cross your fingers.

Damnit, I will FIND spring.

2011-04-29T20:29:00.000-07:00

Spring in Portland this year has been a joke. A HUGE joke. With daytime temps in the 40s and never-ending rain, Barkernews and I could not take it for one more weekend. Or even the weekend after that. Or the weekend after that.

Cue Der Kaiserhutte. For the first time in 2011, we loaded her up and pointed her towards points east AKA the desert which is often full of sun. I was so excited, I could hardly sit still. I love camping. I love the desert. I love my family. I was like that little kid on her way to Disneyland, except for me Disneyland represents the seventh level of hell and camping in the desert represents total bliss.

In the desert, we can ride bikes, trail run, ski, soak up the sun and enjoy a rain-free campfire. Instead of taking medication for anxiety or stress, I go camping and play with my family.

Trailer? Check. Bikes? Check. Skis? Check. Toddler? Oops. Has anyone seen her?

Campfires and s'mores are much more enjoyable with a 2-year-old and dry weather.

Camping in the sun followed by ski days in the sun keep me sane.

The past two weekends, we have camped on the Columbia River and the Deschutes River. That means mud and lots of it. We could not be more pleased.

I put this picture on my screensaver so when I have a difficult day at work, I can look back on my spectacular weekend and say "ahhhh..."

The week in review

2011-04-28T21:38:00.000-07:00

In the last 7 days, I have...

...raced a 10-mile time trial and performed better that I thought was possible (on a road bike, even).

...run a 1-mile time trial on the track with a slight cold/sinus infection/bad attitude and had a PR (6:26).

...completed a power test on the computrainer and improved my average wattage by almost 10 points.

I think it's time for a rest day, don't you?

Oh yeah, and I might also just be an itty-bitty, tiny bit proud. :)

Cherry Blossom- the good, the bad, the ugly

2011-04-10T20:46:00.000-07:00

So, remember back in 2010? Well, let me remind you. Yeah well, I am a BIG FAT LIAR. I said I would never race Cherry Blossom again?

What a difference a year makes.

I went in to the race this year ready to race. I didn't have any grand allusions of winning, but I knew- I just knew- that I could improve dramatically over my 2010 performance. There is a lot to be said for fitness, but there is so much more to be said for mental toughness in bike racing. Hands down, stage racing is the most painful, the most difficult thing I have ever done and anything you can do to train your brain that it's not THAT painful helps to get you through to the end.

I'm working on that. It's a work in progress, but one in which I am seeing marked improvement.

Stage 1 of Cherry Blossom has hills and wind and sun. Everyone is excited and ready to race. The pace is quick. I felt good about everything...until I flatted on mile 2.

FAIL.

Once I switched out my wheel, I time trialed to get back to the group and at the big hill, I blew up. I was so so disappointed. I know that I am so much stronger than last year and to be giving it 100% and watch the lead group ride away from me- it broke me down. I met up with some other riders and finished the stage, but it wasn't the result I wanted. I did congratulate myself on some small things- catching the group after time trialing by myself for those lonely, long miles, giving it 100% regardless of the outcome, and hell, cycling in the SUN.

The massage that night felt amazing and was well-deserved.

This is my ass at the end of stage one.

Day 2 dawned early. The cat 4 women went off for the time trial at 8am. In the desert. In the spring. It was quite chilly. Not having a time trial bike, I did the best I could on the tired legs I had and ended up placing better than previous years. That was thanks to an amazing coach and Thursday mornings spent staring at a computrainer.

Could still use some more of that mental fortitude though. And also three extra sets of legs.

The Barker Grrrr face.

Stage 3 was the crit. It was, hands down, my best crit performance to date. I didn't place as high as the High Desert Omnium crit, but I raced smarter. I'll take it. Knowing stage races aren't won or lost in the crit, I did the best I could to stick like glue to the leaders and save my energy. It worked. It was a rad race. My confidence level soared and I accomplished my goal.

After that, I only had to make it through one more day. I could do that, right?

RIGHT?

Did everything I could to stay in the front pack. Mission accomplished.

Every bike racer needs quality domestiques. I am blessed beyond measure with the Barker Family Cheerleaders.

Crit cooldown with Sara and Sally. Legs...are...so...tired...

Coach told me that lots of girls would start to lose it in Stage 4 and to take advantage of that, to keep my head in the game, to stay with the race leader (not being a threat to win), and to give it everything I had. Coach was right.

Stage 4 was tough, if not physically, then mentally. Everyone was tired, myself included. But I had instructions and damnit, I was going to follow them.

They worked...sort of. I stayed with the leaders until the big climb, at which point everyone blew up. After I had about 5 minutes of self-pity, I decided to get my head in the game and keep racing anyway. In bike racing, there isn't time for self-pity, because in the time you take to feel sorry for yourself, someone is creeping up on you, with strong legs and a whole lot of will.

I ended up 9th in the final race. I was so incredibly relieved to be done, but so freaking proud of myself. I raced smarter and harder than last year. I FELT stronger. I kept my head in the game longer. I kept myself mostly positive.

And? I knew it was only April. The road racing season in Oregon is long and intense. There is a lot of time and many races left yet.

It was a big contrast to last year, leaving this race feeling confident and capable instead of defeated and depressed. It makes those early mornings giving everything I've got on the computrainer bearable. It's a reminder that I can have a family, a full-time job, other hobbies (have I mentioned that I love to ski??) and still perform ok. As I look around the peloton at the beginning of the race, it's hard to find other girls who have all of that and still bike race.

So, yeah. I feel good. Pretty damn good.

Cherry Blossom Stage Race

2011-04-04T13:51:00.000-07:00

More to come, I swear.

The great vastness that is Canada

2011-03-30T21:55:00.000-07:00

It's difficult for me to describe the awesomeness of our week in Whistler with friends and family. We were incredibly fortunate to stay in a great condo, to have multiple days of bluebird skies and sunshine, lots of powder, and the opportunity to spend time with people we love.

What more is there??

If you have never been to Whistler, I command you to go. NOW!

No, really. I am not joking around. Go fill up your gas tank and get yourself there because it is that awe-inspiring of a place.

It is huge. It stretches in every direction. Mountains as far as the eye can see, and really big ones at that. And it is all available for the skiing. Or boarding, as the case may be.

The pictures here are just a small selection from our week, but they represent very well the great time we had. You will notice many grins, lots of snow and big mountains.

Whistler? It is amazing. Simply amazing.

Ann and I met in 1999, when we were both slumming it, working at an outdoor store in Colorado Springs. Now, she's 8 months pregnant with her second kid and kicking my ass on telemark skis. Damn her.

Our posse did its best to find fresh powder every day. We were relentless and we were duly rewarded by the mountain gods.

Gotta have the Barker mountain pic. Always. This is at the top of Blackcomb Glacier.

Hazel enjoyed some ski time too, this time with Eli, one year her junior. They are both in to lots of pink.

Stiles mountain love.

Powder posse!

My brother and his wife think they are models for Whistler or something.

Ho hum. Bluebird day number 3 or something. Life is tough.

Scouting out possible lines. There and there and there and there...

Waiting for the photographer. Let's go!

My pink ski bunny and I.

It's hard to think of how my family could get any more awesome.

Perma-grin.

Stiles dials it up a notch.

Hiking for some turns.

The snow will be good up here, right?

Most definitely, the snow will be good up here.

It's that time of year again

2011-03-07T21:33:00.000-08:00

The time of year when I don lots of spandex and try to look fast.

It doesn't always work, the whole "looking fast" thing, but I am definitely working on it.

Anyway, I went out and raced my bike for the first time 2011 and I did okay. I met some goals, I lost some others. A few good things happened.

The sun came out. That was seriously rad.

I motored past a fair amount of chicks on most of the hills until...I didn't. Running out of gas is not recommended in a bike race.

I remembered that I love to road race.

I hung out with great teammates.

This shit never gets easier.

That was the extent of my thoughts until I inhaled a hamburger and sat in the soaking pool at the nearby McMenamin's.

Cherry Blossom Stage Race, here I come. Ready or well, I will just be ready.

I miss the sun when it's away

2011-02-22T20:34:00.000-08:00

We had originally planned to spend President's Day weekend out of town, but we couldn't find anywhere that was warm AND sunny enough. Having lived in Oregon for seven years now, we should know better. It is winter, after all. Once we gave up on going anywhere, we resolved to spend the weekend together anyway. When you both work, work out on a daily basis, and one of you is in class two nights a week, quality time together is few and far between. We were determined to make it valuable.

I can't remember why we didn't ski on Saturday. Maybe we were tired. Maybe it was super windy on the hill. Maybe we just wanted to be together in a relaxing atmosphere. Regardless, we decided that Hazel needed some hiking training. We plan to hike as much as possible in the coming summer (summer? what's that??) and she's just too big and squirrelly in the backpack. Time for her to work too.

We had our practice out at Powell Butte because it lacks trees and there are views, Barkernews' and I criteria for a really good hike. Forest Park is nice and convenient but it's wet and you don't see anything. Therefore, not our favorite place to spend a Saturday.

It was beautiful. And fun. And relaxed. And lovely. Also, Haze hiked (almost) all of it. Score one for the toddler.

The next day, we did ski. Clark Canyon opened up and we headed straight for it. We love it out there. It's a bit wild, a bit hard to get to and a bit of an adventure. Adventure skiing together? We live for this.

We did manage to break Hazel out of daycare, where she showed us up on the bunny hill, skiing through the "door" and around the cones and generally making the 4-year-olds look weak. We are so proud.

To complete the weekend of togetherness, Barkernews and I did something we have not done in THREE YEARS: we ski patrolled together. Weird, I know. But also weird awesome. We joined Ski Patrol with every intention of always patrolling together. Then the kid came along and patrolling together got more complicated and difficult. It was nice to come back full circle to why and how we joined. My favorite ski patroller will always be Barkernews!

Sibling reunion at White Pass

2011-02-14T20:11:00.000-08:00

My sister was taking off for Liberia at the end of February and she was anxious to spend time with her siblings before she headed off to the great unknown. I was in quick agreement once she suggested a trip to White Pass Ski Resort. It's been several years since I had been there and in that time, they have doubled their terrain. It's also my favorite kind of ski area- locally owned, full of steep runs not overly-frequented by nerg skiers, and family friendly. Big resorts are fun and all (See: our annual trip to Colorado) but I also like to support the little guys- the ones who really care about skiing.

All of us made it out there except Clayton who was probably busy checking out a concert and living up his college life. We missed him. A lot.

But we weren't lacking in good times.

The cousins were the first provide some giggles:

Sunday dawned as a bluebird powder day with spectacular views and lots of freshies. Big grins. Really big grins.

Mustard Two and I have traditions. We have to keep them.

Oh, hi there. It's sunny. The snow is rad. Yeah.

White Pass built a new mid-mountain lodge as part of their addition. I wish Oregon ski areas would catch on.

Big news flash: Hazel skis on her own! She made a huge breakthrough at White Pass and took off without any support from Barkernews or I. That kid was wicked excited!

And then it was over and I was sad that I wouldn't be seeing my sister for quite some time and that she was going to one of the most corrupt countries in the world. Sigh. I miss her already. I wish she would come home soon so we can ski together.

Be safe out there, Ailey. I will save some powder for you!

Ski Days

2011-02-05T20:42:00.000-08:00

We do a lot of skiing around here and we dream and hope of the day our little girl can shred as hard as we do. To that end, we have been getting her on skis as often as possible. And, if we're being honest here, it's almost as much damn fun to ski the bunny hill with my daughter as it is to ski the steep and deeps.

If I look back in to my history, there were many years when I would have never believed that.

Here's the truth: I love my family. I love to ski with my family. Rain, shine, snow, powder, ice, slush: bring it on. 'Cause we're all skiing together.

It's just as much fun to wear pink ski boots around the lodge as it is to ski them.

This toddler sponsored by pink skis from Rossignol...and her parents.

Smiles from a girl on skis. I like.

At the age of 2 1/2, Hazel is a pro on chair lift rides. Next step- slapping some skins on those skis for a little backcountry action.

GIRLS'. SKI. WEEKEND.

2011-01-31T20:41:00.000-08:00

It is difficult to put in to words the radness that is Girls' Ski Weekend. Let's start with this: a bunch of girls who love to ski together for the whole weekend.

It was righteously rad.

While we were skunked by rain at Steven's Pass on Friday, we made the best of it by spending a copious amount of time in the hot tub and hitting the ramp and the table made by some super industrious chicas.

Ailey, Sara, and I spent a lot of time in the hot tub. Hey, we paid our money-might as well use it, right?

We made sure to hit the ramp too. I even went out of my comfort zone and did it on a snowboard. I know, me? Snowboard? Trust me, I thought it was weird too. But also pretty hilarious. And maybe a little bit scary. But mostly hilarious.

We hit up Mission Ridge, where a layer of fresh snow fell on some really, really old snow. It was so gratifying to finally see the snow fall. Some of the skiers headed out to Bomber Cliffs and at the end of the day, EVERYONE hiked the ridge for some slackcountry turns.

It just does not get much better than that- lots of girls hiking in pursuit of the sweetest turns. I like.

On Sunday, we headed out for Steven's Pass again, where we were treated to fresh snow and sunshine. Whoever controls the weather must have heard that the chicas were on their way.

By the end of the weekend, I was beyond exhausted, but so so happy. I skied my butt off, I spent time with girls who love the snow as much as I do, I maybe drank a little bit and I ate my way in to oblivion. The first thing I did when I got home? Put Girls' Ski Weekend 2012 on the calendar. And only then did I kiss my husband and child.

Want to join us at Crystal Mountain the last weekend of January in 2012? Well, better get on the list now because we only let a select group of sick skiing chicas in to our ranks.

And then...

2011-01-26T20:33:00.000-08:00

Barkernews and I went to the mountain the next weekend. We had daycare.

And it rained.

Again.

Despite a weather forecast to the contrary.

For real. It's time to move.

WET

2011-01-25T20:16:00.000-08:00

Way back in January (you know, the month that was insane but disappeared quickly?), I spent the ENTIRE weekend in the rain. Yes, the whole entire weekend. I may have mentioned this here once or twice but just in case, let me remind you: I HATE RAIN. I especially hate rain when it's a deluge on the mountain and a deluge during a running race. I need to move to Arizona, or at least Colorado.

I spent Saturday in a women's sled clinic for ski patrol. It was good, all except for the part when it poured on us. Yes, it poured. On the ski area. This did not make me happy. Sunday, I drove an hour to run a 2-mile race. Where it poured and inflicted gale-force winds. I put in a 14:32 effort, which was shy of my goal time of 14:07. I blame the wind. On the plus side, I wore shorts and a short sleeve shirt in January.

It really sucks when it rains all weekend. I spent the entire 48 hours praying for sunshine for the next weekend. I was seriously Vitamin D deprived.

When tele-nergs come out to play

2011-01-22T20:46:00.000-08:00

It's becoming a theme on this blog to write my posts a month after the actual event. I am going to chalk it up to the insanity that was January, along with going to bed by 9pm every day and oh yeah, I HAVE NO TIME.

No big deal. Luckily, I have mountains of pictures to remember the details and I have a super fun life. I'll write when I can, which is what I am doing now, this time about TeleFest at Hoodoo Ski Resort.

Dear god, TeleFest is awesome. Also, TeleFest is incredibly nerdy. People, modern ski pants include gaiters. No need to add a pair of garishly colored gaiters from the 70s to your ski attire. Also, fanny packs are not attractive on one's fanny, much less on your front.

Why are tele skiers so dorky? And am I really one of them?

Scary.

That said, it was pretty damn cool to ski a mountain packed with telemark skiers. How often does that happen? It would have been super cool to try some demo skis, especially since I am up for a new pair next year, but there weren't any pairs available every time I checked. Note to Telefest 2012 organizer: BRING MORE WOMEN'S SKIS. PRETTY PLEASE.

I met lots of cool people, I took Haze on her first chairlift ride (I almost cried with happiness) and I got to hang out with Craig and Katie, which was, by far, the highlight of my weekend. Nicer people you have never met. No, seriously. Nicer people you have never met. For real.

Hoodoo is a pretty freaking rad small resort with wide open runs and great snow. I dig it and if I didn't live 3 hours away, I would visit more frequently. The lodge is also tailor-made for kids and the daycare is personal and affordable. I love it there.

I also love tele skiing, despite its nerg reputation. Let the others have their gaiters and fanny packs. I just want to ski. A lot.

Katie and I celebrate winning the Nastar race...against ourselves.

Tele posse, sans fanny packs and gaiters.

Daycare, snow and my husband- best combo ever.

Hoodoo's backside is superb especially after a recent snowfall. I dig it.

Hazel's second day of riding the lifts. In this pic, she's an old pro.

The family that skis together...takes naps on the way home together? Freezes their butts off together? Drinks hot chocolate together? Loves to ski? Loves each other?

Warning: Cover all exposed skin!

2011-01-20T19:41:00.000-08:00

It's been 16 days in the making, but I finally found the time to blog about our Annual Colorado Family Vacation 2011.

And let me interrupt myself here by noting that it was sunny there. Given that we haven't seen much sun around these parts since we returned, I think extremely fondly of our vacation...about every two minutes, all day long. Ah...sun...

We had a marvelous time. Really, truly marvelous. Barkernews' parents are beyond generous towards us and indulge us in amazing food, beautiful scenery and free babysitting. They want to do whatever it is we want to do which, of course, is GO OUTSIDE. So in their good natured manner, they bundle themselves up, stomp around in the snow with us and tolerate a sometimes whiny toddler who doesn't understand that wearing sunglasses at 8200ft. is probably a good idea if she doesn't want to go blind before the age of 9. Try explaining this to a 2-year-old. Go on, try. I dare you.

And if you are successful, I will reward you with aforementioned toddler for one whole week. Now, how's that for a prize?

We spent our time sledding, skiing, relaxing, reading lots of books, and attempting to breathe at the ridiculously high altitude where the in-laws live.

After we had done that for a few days, Barkernews and I left them all behind and indulged ourselves in three days in Winter Park, where apparently it was so cold that hell froze over.

You think I'm kidding? I kid not. The thermometer read -20 degrees and the wind speed hovered around 20mph. You can do your own math on the windchill. Barkernews and I toughed it out because we're core like that. Sorta. We had to go in to the lodge every two runs just to re-warm and we kind of skied like shit because we were too cold to get any blood flowing to our legs.

We had fun anyway because NO KID! I mean, really, what more is there to say?

Barkernews and I are die-hard New Year's Eve partiers and so we were asleep by 10pm on the blessed night and spent the next morning laying in bed, watching The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and debating whether to ski or not. The debate wasn't very lively. We were pretty engrossed in our tv show. I mean, these people have REAL problems. Like, which house should they stay in over the weekend? And which staff should accompany them? And, can their clothing consultant rush over some outfits for this weekend excursion?

In the end, we gave up and went to the hot springs, where we sat for three straight hours. Our favorite pool was 107 degrees. The temperature outside warmed up to a balmy -15. There was a 123 temperature difference between the air hitting my head and my body sitting in the hot spring pool. That's just crazy.

On the third day, God granted us a bit of a reprieve and we skied and skied and skied. We skied until the clock forced us to head back to the airport. We couldn't NOT ski. The upper lifts opened and with them, the lightest, freshest, most beautiful powder you have ever seen. It was fresh tracks over and over and over again.

I freaking love Colorado, even if it is donkey butt cold.

The next day, I faced 16 7th grade students who wanted to be back in school about as much as I did and thought, "24 hours ago, I was skiing beautiful powder in Colorado". It was a tough pill to swallow, but at least I know we'll be back next year. And I can remember the sun. Oh, that bright, bright sun.

Well, GOSH, Merry Christmas!

2010-12-27T20:00:00.000-08:00

For the second year in a row, Barkernews had Christmas off. Wow, do I love his job. Unfortunately, he was also on call which meant that we had to stay in town in case someone burned their home down with a turkey fryer/forgot to turn off the space heater/smoked a cigarette in bed/lit fireworks in their bathroom. It was kind a weird conundrum. We couldn't go to Seattle for family Christmas and we couldn't ski, so what the heck were we supposed to do?

We mulled it over while we visited my family the weekend in Seattle before Christmas. It was the usual eat-drink-sleep-presents-eat-drink-sleep round of activities and it was fabulous. As much as I dreamed of having my own bathroom as a child, I love having so many siblings (and in-laws and nephews) now. In fact, there are so many of us, it may be time to start thinking about miniaturizing our stockings just to fit them on the fireplace.

One night, Ailey showed up in her footie pajamas and Marissa decided that she and I needed some of our own RIGHT THEN, so we hopped in her car, ran to Target, located some that fit in the boys' department and rushed home, all in the space of about 15 minutes.

I have a message for Target: You Scare Me. I bought boys' size large footie pjs and they fit. The women's sizes were huge. Really, really huge. People! A small should not mean you are a 6 foot, 250lb. woman. Just sayin'.

Everyone got lots of presents, ate lots of food, collapsed and then drove home to Portland in a coma.

Oh wait, that was just Barkernews, The Hizz and I.

That weekend was the start of my two week winter vacation and OMG OMG OMG I love vacation. I started with week with a powder day with Barkernews and continued with lots of workouts, last minute shopping and even (hold on to your seats) baking a cake from scratch.

See, Barkernews' birthday is on Christmas Eve (he and Baby Jesus are the same age or something), so not only do I have to buy everything for Christmas, but I have to buy his presents as well. It makes for a dry year for him, but a very expensive month for me. And also a little overwhelming, because I? I am not a housewife. Far from it. I don't clean, I sorta cook and I don't even know what one does with an iron. Also, I don't fix things. I am the antithesis of "handy".

This year, I was feeling especially relaxed and I did something completely crazy: I baked a cake from scratch. The frosting, too. You can just call me Betty Crocker now. Hazel and I ate half of the batter and we can report that it was delicious. The (double layer!) product was just as good. Excuse me while I puff up my chest.

I probably won't be repeating that act anytime soon because time is of the essence around here and baking a cake takes a lot of time.

Back to the whole Christmas thing:

Barkernews wanted to play in the snow for his birthday. So we did.

After dinner, his birthday was over (OVER! I say) and we did our small family Christmas thing. I surprised Barkernews with this hipster beauty and he was so excited and happy, I was pretty sure I hit a home run. A cake and a hipster bike? I rule.

The next morning the girl-I-want-to-be-a-tomboy-but-who-is-turning-out-pretty-damn-girly woke up to a "blue ballerina baby doll" (long story) and a tea party set under the tree, which led to endless rounds of tea parties. Luckily, she has a dad who is happy to participate in tea parties for hours and hours and hours. Unluckily, that is not real cake.

To work off our cake and birthday dinners and Christmas dinners and holiday treats, we went to the climbing gym where Hazel spent her time bouldering and playing hide and seek. We are excited that she is old enough to maybe enjoy a little climbing and we plan to take her frequently from now on. If we can just teach her not to walk off cliffs and avoid fallings rocks, we'll be set for some rad excursions to Smith Rocks and the Tieton this spring.

Consider that your Christmas card from me to you because while I may cook like Betty Crocker, that is about the only housewifey thing I can fit in to 2010.

Merry Christmas!

Now, excuse me while I pack for my super rad annual Colorado trip.

Christas gift giving guide: Best present ever for your hard-charging, telemark skiing wife

2010-12-23T10:08:00.000-08:00

At Winter Park, in -15 degree temps

I love to ski. I also live my life in various states of freezing.

At first glance, you would think that these two statements are very contradictory. Skiing happens in cold and often wet places where the more the temperature plummets, the better the snow quality. Indeed, my lack of circulation has led to many a lunchtime in the lodge almost crying as I wait for my appendages to re-warm themselves.

Barkernews has put up with my whining for 12 winter seasons and counting. He has tried to sympathize with my constantly freezing fingers and toes in 40 degree weather. He rolled his eyes when I chose our new vehicle based solely on the fact that it had seat warmers (which I use any time the temperature is below 65 degrees, thank you very much).

And then he took action. A man can only put up with the complaining for so long, even a man as patient as he. First, he bought me these, the mitten to end all mittens. And, indeed, they were quite warm. But the rest of me was still cold.

"Put on more layers," he said. I did and I looked (and felt) just like Randy. It's impossible to ski well with that many clothes on, much less use the bathroom. Regardless, I was still cold.

Yes, I am aware that I need to live somewhere where the thermometer regularly reads 95 degrees. Maybe at that temperature I could give up my wool socks.

Then, last Christmas, Barkernews gave me the diamond ring of coats: this beautiful baby. In my years of outdoor adventure, I have never worn an insulated coat. The theory was always that layering was better. Not to mention, uh...insulated coats kinda make you look fat.

This coat? It's insanely warm, form-fitting and allows me to move. And I am never, ever cold when I wear it. Going with the theory that if your core is warm, your appendages are warm, my fingers stay toasty, my toes are happy and me? I am done complaining. Now, I am constantly saying, "I love this coat so much I want to marry it."

Last year, I wore it on a 40 degree day in the rain. I wore it in -15 degrees at Winter Park (and that was pre-wind chill). One day, this coat might wear out and I will go in to withdrawal, I love it that much.

And Barkernews? Well, he hit a home run for Christmas 2009. Some girls want jewelry. Some girls want spa packages. I just want to be warm so I can spend less time in the lodge and more time shredding the powder with my best friend (whose own internal temperature must be set to 115 degrees).

Breckenridge. The temperature might be in the teens?

Running...in one big circle

2010-12-17T12:54:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, a really ugly Pineapple Express arrived in the Northwest and made skiing conditions horrendous. Life is too short to ski in the rain, especially of the driving, pouring variety, so Barkernews and I wisely decided to stay home. It was a good thing we did because we still had no Christmas tree or Christmas lights, or anything resembling the Christmas spirit in our house. Not to mention that Barkernews organized the West Linn holiday parade and fire station open house. He was required to show up.

It did indeed rain a lot. Temperatures were indeed unseasonably warm. It was meh.

However, good things happened. The holiday parade was wicked cute, with drenched little Cub Scouts and poor Santa trying not to drown. I got to see Barkernews in hospitality action and Hazel only mildly screamed when we sat on Santa's lap.

Sunday was a little less mild. Coach put on my December calendar "run in a 5K race". Since I wasn't skiing, I signed up for the Ho Ho 5K, a nice combination of road and trails with some hills. Most of us think, "5K? No problem!" I mean, it's only three miles. How hard can it be?

Really, really, REALLY hard, especially if your coach is running with you the entire time, forcing you to run three miles faster than you have ever run in your life, especially a hilly 3 miles. Yikes. I ran so hard, my arms were tired, my abs were tired and my legs wanted to give out. I am pretty sure I hyperventilated. I was confident I was going to puke. The whole thing hurt. A lot.

And afterwards? I wanted to do it again, albeit not for awhile, but even FASTER. I was the 9th female across the finish line. I wanted to do better than that and in the future, I think I can. So, yeah, I am kinda motivated now. I think my coach knew what he was doing when he put a 5K race on my schedule. ;)

The rest of my week has been spent recovering from a silly little 5K. For real. That thing kicked my butt, despite the fact that I do a 7 mile run, plus a track workout, plus a brick workout (bike + run) once a week. Oh yeah, then I went to the pool for the first time since July. That also hurt.

Despite no skiing, I have managed to beat my body up as if I DID ski two full days in a row. Yawn. Sooooo looking forward to winter vacation, which starts in one hour and 40 minutes. But who's counting?

For your viewing pleasure, choosing a Christmas tree in the rain and wearing yoga pants, because there seemed like no other option on Sunday afternoon:

The Mountain Life

2010-12-07T19:09:00.000-08:00

Three pairs of skis ready to rip

Barkernews and I harbor a very vibrant dream of living in a mountain town. We don't really care about the size or the quality of the house, nor do we care about living in a desired zip code. We just want to be 15 minutes or less from the ski lifts. Ideally, we would be able to take public transit or walk. Ideally, it would also snow in this mountain town with great regularity and hardly ever rain. Ideally...well, it's our dream and we're sticking to it.

Why do I bring this up? Sometime on our 4th trip on Highway 26 in two days, I sighed and again lamented how much damn time we spend on that highway riddled with stoplights and 45mph speed limits instead of already being home, cooking up some chili and sitting in front of a fire. Every winter, we contemplate a combination of season rental, cabin purchase, trailer retrofit, hostel rental, and couch surfing to make our trips to Mt. Hood slightly less onerous. But rarely do the numbers play out (especially purchasing a vacation home in a mountain town where it frequently RAINS during the winter. No thanks.). And while I feel a special affinity for Mt. Hood (as I should, given the 40+ days I spend on that mountain per year), my heart lies in a real mountain town: Durango or Breckenridge or Bend or Taos. One where the sun shines, the snow is light and the mountains are big. So I can never bring myself to put a large chunk of my paycheck towards a cabin in Government Camp.

It makes no sense, I know. I am not moving from Portland anytime soon, which means I will continue spending a ridiculous amount of days on Hood and a ridiculous amount of money on gas. But, really, I am just waiting for the right opportunity to pop up in Winter Park or Park City or Tahoe.

I might be waiting awhile.

Luckily, I am prepared for a long wait. Mt. Hood offers everything this family of 3(!) skiers currently needs: several ski areas to choose from, a magic carpet to learn on, affordable season passes, and yes, even some pretty rad black diamond terrain.

This weekend, we embarked on our journey as a skiing family instead of just a skiing couple. At the ripe old age of 2 years and 4 months, Hazel made her first trip up the bunny hill, via the magic carpet, which strategically went through a tunnel. Side note: A magic carpet through a tunnel? BRILLIANT. No toddler can turn that opportunity down. Anyway, I may or may not have shed a small tear as Hazel and I skied down the hill together. Barkernews and I, we love to ski. It's a vital part of our lives. So to have Hazel finally do it with us, albeit slowly and very well supported...well, I just hope it's only the beginning of a long and illustrious career as a skiing family.

On Sunday, we made the trip back to the mountain, this time to ski patrol, and Hazel hit the slopes again. She asked all day, "Can I ski?" and we finally let her, cold temps and wind be damned. She immediately wanted to do it "by myself". I may or may not have cried for the second time in two days. This is kid is Olympic material, I am sure of it.

There is only one thing that would have made me even happier: pulling Hazel in her sled 15 minutes to the ski lift from the front door of our house.

One day, my dear daughter, one day.

Gratitude

2010-11-30T21:02:00.000-08:00

In spite of, or maybe because of, a crazy fall season, I felt especially thankful for the gifts in my life last week and I am working hard at holding on to that feeling of appreciation every day, whether it is Thanksgiving or a random Wednesday in March. I like Thanksgiving in all its historical inaccuracy for the food and the family and the friends, but also because it's a huge, glaring, in your face reminder that you should take a step back and BE GRATEFUL, DAMNIT.

And I can honestly say that a big slap in the face demanding that we be thankful, if only for one day a year...well, it's not such a bad thing.

Here are things I am grateful for:

My family. My large, obnoxious, will-do-anything-for-you-in-a-heartbeat family. I have one husband, one daughter, three grown siblings, two in-laws, two parents, two parents-in-law, one grandfather, one grandmother-in-law, and one gorgeous baby nephew. I am truly blessed.

My support system AKA my friends who assure me I am not crazy. Enough said.

My job. It drives me to the brink of insanity again and again, but I don't think I could do anything else. When my most out-of-control student voluntarily shows up on a teacher workday to help me "organize my bookshelves" and maybe, just maybe, to chat a little, my job is pretty darn cool.

My outlets: cycling, running, skiing, climbing, camping, hiking. They define me, they give me confidence, they serve as the best mental health treatment out there.

How did I demonstrate my gratitude? I ate and ate and ate, I jogged a 5K at rest pace, I skied, I went on a date with my husband, I threw my screaming toddler on Santa's lap, I cheered my sister on in her half-marathon and then I helped her purchase her first real road bike.

Yep, so very damn grateful.

Waving the flag: I surrender.

2010-11-20T20:41:00.000-08:00

The 2010 cycling season is now in the books. Here is the final count:

10 cyclocross races

5 mountain bike short track races

22 road races (including 2 stage races)

And now I surrender. Time for some donuts and ice cream and no racing and lots and lots of skiing.

However, 2010? It was a good year for me. Thanks to my awesome coach, I managed to finally figure out that, yes, I can be a good bike racer and became so much faster than I could have imagined. Also, thanks to my amazing husband who has been more excited this season over my successes than me. His favorite saying? "It's hot that you're so fast." :)

At the beginning of the cross season, I thought for sure there was no way I would even be a mid-pack racer in the Bs. I guess I was proved wrong. I may or may not have my sights set on moving up to the As at some point next year, but I am not revealing anything any time soon.

At least not until my body recovers from hitting the deck at the OBRA CX Champs this afternoon. Off-camber mud and a nicely placed fence really make for some wicked whiplash. Ouch. More than that, my ego probably needs to recover. I was going to do well- I could feel it. I had the hole shot. I was competing with another girl for the lead. I was feeling good.

It's bruising to watch the entire field pass you by while you try and figure out if you have a head injury and then try and get your bike back in to working condition. It's tough not to cry as you get back on the course all by your lonesome, in a lot of pain, and think, "but I was up there".

Yeah, it's just a bike race. Yeah, I get to go skiing in 30 inches of fresh powder tomorrow. But you know what? I have never been really competitive in ANY sport, much less bike racing-this despite 5 years of experience in the sport. So, to be in a position where I WAS competitive? I am beating myself up a little.

Barkernews did tell me after the race that the only reason I fell was because I was totally going for it and that is something to be proud of. He's right. I was 110% going for it when I went down. I was f'ing determined to medal. I guess it just wasn't my day. In the positive column? I stayed on my bike for every part of the course, with the exception of 1 runup and 1 barrier. That not seem like a big deal, but if you saw how many people ran through the off-camber mud instead of riding it, you would understand. I also caught a few stragglers in my category. I refused to give up. I hammered as hard as I could, despite knowing there was no way in hell I could get back up there.

And with that, the 2010 racing season was over. Adios, road bike. Ciao, mountain bike. Auf Wiedersehen, beloved cyclocross bike. Enjoy your rest now, because we have big plans for

2011.

Really, really big plans.

Flat is not my thing

2010-11-16T20:17:00.000-08:00

Well. It's Tuesday again (it does seem to come around every week, doesn't it? Strange.) and I have yet to update ye olde blogg, mainly because *gasp* there is a distinct dearth of pictures around these parts.

Yes, it's true. The Barkers have actually managed to go two weeks without taking hardly any pictures. I'll give you what I do have, 'kay? And then I promise to take more pictures- of my kid, of cyclocross, and of ski patrolling in the SNOW this coming weekend. Deal?

Two weekends ago, I suited up for the Apple Core 'Cross race, a little event that our own esteemed Kenji Sugahara put on. My brother and the cutest nephew ever, Eli, came out to cheer me on. It was pretty small, being the first year for this race and all, and there were only 3 women in the B category. It was also pancake flat. I decided to call it a cross criterium. Two of the women in my category beat me. I'll leave the math up to you.

Regardless, it was a really fun race in a really fun venue. As the slave to a toddler, I found it perfect for the under 4-feet set: a hay-bale house, awesome playground, close close-in parking and a food cart that sold sausages. It was win-win, my third placement excluded.

And, if we're being honest and I assume we are, being third didn't really bother me. I didn't have this race on my calendar to begin with and I just wanted to enjoy going fast on my bike. Mission accomplished.

The next day, Barkernews, Nathan, and I took ~~two hours~~ 20 minutes load up the truck for a 10-mile bike ride down Marine Drive with a baby and a toddler. I would rate it an A+ success, except for the part when Hazel's feet fell asleep (I didn't strap them down and they were dangling/kicking me the entire time) and she cried for 2+ miles. So, I will call it an A- success. Still pretty damn good.

Then, Barkernews and I worked three whole days. I know, I know, you don't have to tell me. It was Rough. Really, really rough. I was sad for myself. Honestly. Truly.

To start off our 4-day weekend, we took Haze out to Stub Stewart State Park, where we had rented one of their sweet one-room cabins for the night.

It then proceeded to rain. And rain and rain and rain and rain, dashing all hopes of a chill bike ride on the Banks-Vernonia State Trail or a campfire. What we ended up doing was a lot of reading, singing silly toddler songs, drinking a lot of wine and going to bed early. Life was not so bad.

The next morning, we woke to beautiful blue skies and headed north to Vernonia on the bikes, where we drank coffee, visited the playground, and threw pinecones in to the Nehalem River.

And then we went home.

Why did we go home if it was a 4-day weekend? Because, people, Barkernews and I were actually going away for a weekend together. Alone. No kid. No family. No friends. Just Us.

Excuse me while I revel in that some more: Just Us.

Thanks to Aunt Ailey and Uncle Ritchie (and a surprise appearance by Teacher Rena), Barkernews and I turned the car towards Dufur and didn't look back.

A lot of people asked us why we chose Dufur over, say, Bend, or Hood River or the coast. The truth is this: we don't really like people that much.

Okay, okay, not totally true, but if you're going to spend some QT with your SO, don't you want to just focus on that person?

Plus, Dufur is cool. It sits dead center in prime road biking territory and is the terminus of Forest Road 44, where lots of cool things happen to be. Oh yeah, and it's sunny over there.

We ate lots and lots and lots of gourmet food, drank lots and lots of local wine, ran some trails, read some books, had some massages, slept on to-die-for feather beds (Balch Hotel), and rode our bikes. I didn't have to deal with one toddler tantrum or cook anything or talk any 13-year-olds off a ledge. I didn't have to be anywhere at any time. And I got to do it all with the love of my life.

It was perfect and I kinda didn't want to come home.

Luckily, I have a blonde-haired 2-year-old wearing a tutu over a monkey costume who greets me enthusiastically when I DO come home. Thank god, because otherwise? I might just hole myself up in the Balch Hotel forever and never come out.

Racing and costumes and other assorted thoughts

2010-11-05T08:50:00.001-07:00

I had such an awesome weekend last weekend, it took me 5 days to write about it. Oh yeah, and I have been crazy busy and crazy tired and, well, ready to do it all over again now that Friday has arrived.

The Barker family went to Astoria for the Halloween weekend, where we bike raced, relaxed in a swank house with friends, ate fresh crab, wore some ridiculous costumes and bike raced some more. It was exactly what the doctor ordered. We haven't been out of town as a family since Labor Day weekend.

Labor Day weekend!

Do you understand how difficult that is for us? Most of the time, we go MONTHS without spending a weekend in town. And while our dirty clothes pile up and our house gathers dust, we are off to points unknown, exploring the Northwest and generally having a fabulous time. So, yeah, it was time.

It was good for me too. My job, combined with Barkernews' new job responsibilities and his two-night-per-week school attendance, combined with general life stress, was sending me over the edge.

No, not THAT edge. Just the edge between sane NoPoGirl and crazy NoPoGirl. I don't really like crazy NoPoGirl, and I am sure most you don't either, so I signed myself up for some very expensive, but very worth it counseling. Did you know that licensed psychologists make $220 per 45 minute session? I didn't either, but I am clearly in the wrong profession, except for the fact that I don't really like to listen to other people's problems for hours on end. I think I will stick with teaching middle school students, where I only have to listen to their problems for an hour or two per day and then I can go home and have a drink.

In this process of deciding I needed a therapist, combined with finding a therapist that matched my style (heads up hippie counselors...your "energy therapy" is not really my thing) and then trying to get an appointment with said therapist, I have learned that 1. I am not crazy as previously imagined and 2. Apparently, everyone I know sees a therapist and has been doing so for years.

WHY DIDN'T YOU GUYS TELL ME??

Typical conversation with friends went like this:
Me: So, I think I need therapy.
Friend: Oh, I have the best person. I see her every week. Here's her card.
Me: Why did you not share this with me before just so I don't feel so freaking crazy?!
Friend: *Shrug* Only the truly crazy people think they're sane. Everyone I know sees somebody.

Well, GEEZ.

Back to bike racing. I just thought I would share the above information because, well, it's my blog and I felt like it. Also, if you are not currently seeing somebody, apparently you need to and you might be crazy.

Astoria involved two days of bike racing. Way back in September, I set the first day as a goal race with the intention of wearing my costume and completely screwing around in the race on Sunday. Without puffing up my chest too much or sounding like an obnoxious prick...GOAL ACCOMPLISHED. I killed it on Saturday. The course involved two big hills, one of which most girls chose to run up. I rode it. every. single. time. Ouch. But so awesome at the same time. I played with 1st, 2nd, and 3rd places with two other wicked fast chicks for awhile, beating them on the heinous hill and then getting creamed in the crit-like corners. In the end, I came in 3rd and it was the proudest 3rd of the season. I went hard and I put everything I had in to the race. All that training? It pays off. First place was 20 seconds ahead of me. Not bad for a chick who has a full time job, a 2-year-old, a position on ski patrol council and other life responsibilities.

Sunday was all about FUN. Barkernews went as a hula girl and a damn sexy one at that. The Hizz went as a monkey. Thanks to Heather's stroke of genius, she and I went as the Yup Yup Aliens from Sesame Street. We decided ahead of time to race, but not to race. We stopped at every obstacle, consulted our Earth Book and debated how to approach the obstacle ("yup yup yup, noooope, nope, nope"). We still managed three laps and also managed to pass a bunch of beginner women. If you're getting passed by a Yup Yup Alien, it may not be a good sign. I'm just sayin'.

That was easily one of the most fun races I have ever done. We came in last and next-to-last, but that wasn't the point. We had a great time and thought we were hilarious. Whether everyone else thought we were hilarious...well, that's not my problem. (though, I did find it amusing when we were told by some spectators to get off the course because it wasn't fair to people racing.)

Lots of good things happened this weekend. I spent some time away with very favorite people. I had an amazingly successful race. I dressed up as an alien and acted stupid. Had you asked me five years ago if I could have predicted that I would be in contention for winning a bike race or that I would dress up as an alien and acted stupid, I would have been in shock. That was definitely NOT ME. But, wow, I am so glad it is me.

I am going to tell that one to my therapist.

Approaching the heinous hill. Dear heinous hill: I love you.

My hula girl and my monkey. They go together well, no?

You have never seen aliens like these on a bike before, I am sure of it.

And, just in case you are unclear about who the Yup Yup Aliens are, here is your education:

The snoweth? It flyeth.

2010-10-28T18:51:00.000-07:00

So. It's snowing already in the mountains. A lot.

And I'm thinking of delicious tele turns down hills filled with powder and speed and my breath appearing in clouds in front of my face and hot coffee on a cold winter day and my amazingly warm Patagonia jacket and my sick Scarpa T1 boots and hanging out in the ski patrol building shooting the shit and hiking at Mission Ridge with my girls and throwing snowballs with my toddler and screaming with joy as I go so very fast and hauling sleds and digging out tower pads and pulling my red-nosed little girl in her sled and smiling so big, really big as I ski in unison with my husband...

and, wow, I can't wait.

It's making it a little hard to concentrate on this:

Ninkrossi- A Photo Essay

2010-10-17T20:40:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, the stars align, things work out, you roll out of bed on the right side, breakfast is delicious...sometimes, life is just GOOD.

Saturday? Saturday was good. The weather was amazing. The Barkers were back together again. Ailey and Ritchie were here to visit. The bike racing venue was amazing. It was that kind of day.

Somebody here was pretty damn happy to spend some time with her daddy. I think the feeling was mutual.

I tried my best to get Barkernews to ride faster. Yelling at him that I could run faster than he could ride may or may not have helped.

BFFs (Hazel and Aunt Ailey) back together again.

The start of the Women's B race. I am trying to support smaller, Saturday races this year (vs. the masses at Cross Crusade). I like them. They are laid-back, fun and I don't have weave my way around 60 other girls just in my own category to get a good spot.

Photo courtesy of Dave Roth

Winding my way through the (uphill) singletrack. I gave it 100% at this race and then I gave it 10% more. It. Was. Awesome. I did made a crucial error in the 3rd lap, bounced my bike off the barriers and subsequently lost my chain. Thus, I lost at least two places and slipped to 6th. Bummer. Overall, I was pretty pleased with my performance.

Photo courtesy of Dave Roth

Bring It.

2010-10-13T20:37:00.000-07:00

It was kind of a crappy week. Again. Work wasn't really any better. Barkernews was still out of town. And my toddler vomited all over me for a couple of days. I was the world's worst mom and tried to will her better, but when we attempted to the drive out to Heiser Farms so I could race, she promptly vomited all over the back seat of the car.

We both cried. Again. The faucets have been flowing pretty liberally around here.

To stop my ridiculous pity party (god, I am such a pathetic single parent), I hopped on my bike trainer while the sick kid slept and I rode hard. I hate my bike trainer times a million, but at least I got some frustration out.

Sunday came and with it, pissing rain and the chance to race. Hizz felt better. I felt anxious to get out of the house. We made the one hour drive to Rainier in 45 minutes (don't tell Barkernews) and I raced in the thick, gooey, peanut buttery mud. I put my racing anxiety away in a deep, dark corner and did what I know how to do: just keep pedaling.

I am not kidding when I say that bikes + mud= good for the soul. It was a tough race, with a wicked uphill and mud that caused most racing chicks to dismount and run and run and run instead of ride. But it was so much fun and so worth it. Something about getting your heart rate up to 190 and straining those hip flexors really makes everything right in the world.

Then Barkernews came home and everything was good.

Even better times ahead.

Here is what I looked like on Sunday, one giant bug:

(Photo courtesy of Dave Roth)

(No) Head in the Game

2010-10-07T20:24:00.000-07:00

Last week was a long, drug out, agonizing affair. Work was tough. It never seemed to end and I never seemed to be successful at a job that I have been performing well for the past 9 years. Talk about an ego blow. Then, because my ego wasn't flattened enough already, I couldn't get it together enough to race in the XC race on Thursday night and spent that time on the sidelines, wondering why I didn't just go have a glass of wine. And because I wanted to further pound my ego in to the ground, I raced at the David Douglas CX race on Saturday, where I defeated myself in the first 50 feet and subsequently performed horribly.

And then I cried. Because nothing had gone right for me in the past 7 days and my husband was out of town for the next 10. Because my dirty laundry stretched all the way to the ceiling, my refrigerator was completely empty save for 1 beer, and because the trash hadn't been taken out in 2 weeks.

I wanted to go to Hawaii on the next jet plane.

But I didn't. I went on a trail run instead and that was the start of feeling better about things- slowly. Oh yeah, and my mom came for the week and cooked and cleaned and took care of the toddler. That helped tremendously

I'm still mad at myself- about my job, about my race performance, about why I am just so damn tired, but I am ready to use that anger for something else. Instead of beating myself up, I am ready to beat someone else up on the race course. Maybe. Hopefully. We'll see.

And if I don't? Well, then I don't and at least I got to see the pumpkin cannon at Heiser Farms.

Welcome to the mud season

2010-09-29T10:10:00.000-07:00

AKA the "it takes an hour to clean my bike every weekend" season. Can also be called "the pain cave is very very deep" season.

Photo courtesy of Dave Roth. Thanks, Dave!

From bike racer to bike commuter

2010-09-20T21:20:00.000-07:00

Look at me! I am on the path to being a normal NoPo Girl again! And, oh, thank god. I do not do well when I do not have a work/life balance. That doesn't work so well for me. I like to play.

One of the better parts of my new job is the ability to bike commute to and from work. It's pretty awesome. This summer, I was graciously given a Globe bike for my birthday (you can see it above in my header). I set it up with a seat for Hazel, fenders, and lights, and away I have gone. Literally. It's the perfect commute bike- I wear my normal work clothes, I don't have to put on silly cycling shoes with clipless pedals and I am allowed to go slow. I love it. Hazel loves going to and from school on the bike and I arrive at work awake and refreshed, not to mention motivated.

Other than that?

I have actually sort of been training this year- for bike racing and for running. Being devoid of a goal race last season really affected me and the quality of my workouts. I felt a difference. These days, I go to the gym at 6:30 (yes, in the AM) for track workouts and brick workouts (bike/run) and I get myself on a trail and a road every week for some running and cycling. I can feel myself getting faster and stronger and it makes me very excited. It has also done wonders for my "athletic ego". The previous me: I just want to hang on. The new me: I will make those other girls suffer!

I like it.

In other news, we took some trips before the chaos of the school year started.

First, Hazel and I went camping at Lake Cushman with Ailey and Ritchie. It was decidedly not warm enough to swim. In August. LAME. We hiked the Skykomish River instead and spent some time on Hood Canal.

Then, all three of us went to Colorado to see the in-laws. We whiled away some time in the national park and Barkernews and I climbed Mt. Ypsilon. I was surprised at how easy it was, but not at all shocked to find myself with a bruised and bloody shin after falling in the boulder field. Ms. Coordination, that's me.

And, finally, we went to my parents' cabin in Sunlands, WA for what has become an annual Labor Day gathering of family. It was, once again, not warm enough to spend time on the river (this summer=FAIL), but we hiked the Ancient Lakes-where it was warm enough to swim- (Dad of course brought his gun) and climbed the Coulee.

That is all. Bike racing ahead. Stay tuned.

In to the vortex

2010-09-13T21:03:00.000-07:00

Well, THAT was a long absence. Sorry about that. I grossly underestimated the amount of work and time my new job would entail. It was a little soul-crushing and I am only now beginning to see glimpses of a very small, flickering light.

What it comes down to is this: starting a new job is hard. Really, really hard. Especially if you were pretty damn competent at your old job. Despite its difficulties and challenges, however, I highly recommend that everyone switch jobs a few times in their career. In the end, I think I will be a better teacher than if I had stayed in my old job (which I also loved) for years and years and years ad nauseum.

But that doesn't make the whole adjustment period any easier. I am trying desperately to hang on to shreds of the life I know and love, if only to maintain sanity during my working hours. So, you know, I get up at insanely early hours and I go to the track or I go to the spin room or I run on a trail, and sometimes I go to a bike race.

What I have gained from my new job thus far: a bike commute with my daughter (the awesomeness of this cannot be understated), more time in my day (less overall commute time), smaller class sizes, a tighter community, new and different challenges.

What I have lost from my new job thus far: Dear husband, I would like to make plans to see you in the year 2013. Do you think we will both be available? Also, could you tackle the massive mound of laundry? Thanks so much. Love, your adoring wife.

That about sums it up.

Now on to bike racing.

Cyclocross season has started. For real. I am beyond excited, maybe because I have this rad new bike or maybe just because I love cyclocross. Barkernews and I went out for some Pain and Suffering this weekend, because I hadn't experienced enough during my work week and I needed to suffer some more.

Suffer I did. I think I threw up in my mouth a little at the top of the big hill (which *ahem* I rode every freaking time), but oh my god I loved it. Also, I came in 4th in the women's B category. That could also explain why I loved it so much. Next up? Battle at Barlow, with its infamous runup and most likely a field twice the size of the last race (15). *GULP*

Now, back in to my hole. See you when I emerge again.

ABSENT

2010-08-31T21:15:00.000-07:00

And not completing my make-up work.

I'm around and I have loads of pictures and stories to share. But I am in the whirlwind that is a new job added on to a sinus infection from hell.

I will be back soon. I swear.

100% tech free

2010-08-18T21:01:00.000-07:00

A couple days ago, I read a column in the paper (yes, the actual paper- I still receive and read such an archaic item) about the saving grace of furlough days. The author was overworked before he had furlough days forced upon him. He didn't appreciate the decrease in pay. However, he ended up using his furlough Fridays to take his family on 3-day camping trips

around the region. The conclusion of this column was the author proclaiming the value of that time with his family was invaluable and he wouldn't take the pay back if he could. In fact, he touts the necessity of taking (unpaid) time out more often than we work-addicted Americans are wont to do.

I, of course, agree with him. When it comes down to it, I don't think there is a price tag for family time. Of course, I am a teacher and I receive many more weeks of vacation per year than the average American, so this is pretty easy for me to say. But, think about this: would you take less pay to have more family time? Not sit-on-the-couch-and-watch-reality-tv family time, but real, quality family time? Without a phone or computer or connection to the rest of the world?

Honestly, would you?

If I didn't already enjoy 9 weeks a year of vacation time, I think I would. As I was reminded on our recent technology-free vacation, the time I spent just being with my two favorite people was refreshing and affirming.

Witness:

We went cold turkey on vacation. No phone, no email, no Facebook (I know, GASP!). The first day, I didn't know what to do with my hands while Barkernews drove. The second day, I thought about my phone once or twice. The third day, I didn't care. I was having a splendid time and everything I needed was right there. I could feel my entire body relax despite spending hours in the car, hours on the trail and sleeping on the ground. Hazel got real, quality attention. Barkernews got real, quality attention.

It was a big shift for our family from go go go go, keep going, go, go go some more to well, what's here now is what's going on. Without technology, we quit caring what time it was or where everyone else was. It was all about us.

Then, when we came home, I had hundreds of emails in my inbox and 25 voice mail messages. I didn't really want to read or respond to any of them. It all seemed so busy and overwhelming. And pointless.

In the real world, those things aren't pointless. I know that. I am not a hippy who grows her own food, cans her own vegetables or makes her own clothes and lives off of the grid. Yeah, the world kept spinning while we were gone, but the three of us just spun around each other and that's what mattered the most.

It was difficult to accept the reality that it doesn't work that when we're not on vacation. So we returned to our tech-addicted ways, but with a goal: More weekends without the ubiquitous phones or computers. We'll be out of touch every now and then. And it will be awesome.

Vacation: The Last Chapter

2010-08-17T20:46:00.001-07:00

Yeah, so I promised you this 2, 3 weeks ago maybe? I really don't know what I have been doing in that time besides a whole lot of nothing and then going back to work. Honestly, I have no excuse. Sorry. Excuse my blog tardiness. Then again, maybe not. I mean, it's my blog and I can post if I want to, right?

Whatever. Here it is.

For the last three days of vacation, we went to my parents' cabin in Sunlands, WA. Nate, Marissa, and Eli joined us and it was three days of fabulous. It was hot. Super hot, which is just the way I like it. Super hot is super bueno for river chillaxing, pool swimming and jet skiing. We did that for three straight days in an unbroken chain of apply sunscreen, find water, re-apply sunscreen, find different water, repeat, repeat, repeat. Oh, we might have ridden our bikes a time or two. Maybe. But mostly there was a lot of water involved.

Gosh, I love vacation.

In the end, we were devastated to drive home. We love Portland and all, but vacation is so sweet. The lack of demands on us or our time was precious. The state of relaxation reached was off the charts. Hazel concurred, as evidenced by one of the pictures below.

We spent 9 days together, exploring, camping, hiking, cycling, swimming, playing in the sand, chillaxing and I want it all back. I want to close my eyes during those dark, dark days of January when it seems the rain will never stop and the temperature will never rise past 50 degrees and transport myself to Rainier, or Stehekin, or the cabin. I am looking ahead to our next vacations- Colorado and Whistler in 2011- and they seem far, far away.

Long live vacations. Especially sunny ones filled with adventure.

Stehekin

2010-08-09T14:36:00.000-07:00

Here's the deal about Stehekin: It's on the northern tip of Lake Chelan. It is in North Cascades National Park. It is only reachable by boat or float plane. It has 95 year-round residents and minimal amenities. Your cell phone won't work there. There are no televisions. It is probably 95 degrees outside. The lake is probably 55 degrees.

Oh yeah, and it is awesome.

In my youth, I went to Lake Chelan many, many times with my family. But I had never been to Stehekin. And so, the week before vacation when Barkernews suggested Stehekin, I immediately went online and booked the only available room at the Stehekin Landing Resort. It was the best decision we made about our vacation.

I know it's a cliche to say this, but the feeling of being in Stehekin is pretty indescribable. Everyone who is there is marooned there- at least until the next boat comes. There is one small restaurant, one extremely limited (and expensive) little store, a boat rental dock, a bike rental shop, and a bakery. And miles and miles of solitude on steep, strikingly beautiful hiking trails.

Nothing moves quickly, and to be fair, you don't want it to. You could spend hours dangling your feet off the dock, staring at mountains that rise 7000ft.(!) up and contemplate renting a kayak or renting a bike or hiking to the top of a mountain. Or not.

I told Barkernews it was like summer camp for adults. I cried when we left.

Without further ado, a Stehekin photo essay:

We wanted to camp close to Chelan to catch the 8:30am ferry. This is the one and only campsite we found. Private, no? The one benefit of this campsite? It was right on the Columbia River which we immediately jumped in to after setting up camp in the 9000 degree heat.

All aboard for Fields Landing, Lucerne and Stehekin!

The captain of the Lady of the Lake II lets anyone drive his boat, including Hazel and I.

Upon arrival, we promptly rented bikes and a bike trailer for Hizz to see what we could see. Someone here knows exactly what is going on.

One of the stop-off points in our self-directed bike tour was Rainbow Falls. The day that we left Stehekin, the area around here burned in a forest fire. We just looked for bears.

Lake Chelan, the subject of my dreams. Cold? Extremely. But I must swim, no matter where I am.

This is how things go in Stehekin. I am going to start calling it Stehekin Time.

Grilling next to the public dock. Most delicious meal of the trip.

One day, I will fly in a float plane, cost be damned

I was keen to swim. Hazel was not.

LOVE IT.

Stehekin Landing Resort, one of the few places to stay in Stehekin. And in my opinion, the best. Right in the center of the "action" (ha!) and right on the lake.

Barkernews finally gave in to my taunting and swam in the frigid water.

Gratuitous family photo on a paddle boat.

I can't help not including this picture. It pretty much describes vacation.

On the east side

2010-08-04T10:10:00.000-07:00

I am not lying to you when I tell you that 7 days before our vacation? We had no idea where we were going. Barkernews and I threw around a myriad of ideas ranging from the Canadian Rockies to the Sierras. Ultimately, what it boiled down to was this: How long do you want to spend in the car with a toddler whose primary goal in life is to get OUT of the car? That kind of killed some of our grand ideas because before vacation, we all liked each other well enough. The goal was to like each other even more after vacation, not like each other less.

Barkernews was the one who came up the Barker Family Vacation Grand Plan of Summer 2010, aka BFVGPS10: Three days in the northeast corner of Mt. Rainier (which we have never visited), three days in Stehekin on Lake Chelan (which we have never visited) and three days in Sunlands (which have visited many, many times). It had all the elements of a successful vacation with a toddler: camping, hiking, lakes, some cycling and running thrown in for good measure and, ultimately, car trips that were no longer than 3 hours at a stretch. Oh yeah, and it was fairly cheap. Barkernews is a genius.

We promptly drove to the northeast corner of Mt. Rainier. This journey was delayed a little by stopping for cash, stopping at the waffle cart, stopping at Safeway, losing wallet at Safeway, driving past Vancouver before realizing that wallet was lost at Safeway, sitting in traffic on the I5 bridge to get back to Safeway, buying more diapers at Safeway, placating toddler at Safeway...all of that and we still got to Mt. Rainier by 4pm.

The weather was perfect. The scenery was perfect. The toddler was nearly perfect. During our three days at Mt. Rainier, we hiked, we camped, we ran, we cycled, we swung in the hammock and we sat around the campfire. Oh yeah, and we didn't check our cell phones.

I should probably discuss that part of our vacation for a brief minute. Before vacation, Barkernews and I agree that the entire week was to be a "communication-free zone". As in, no computers, no phones. Period. We couldn't even turn them on. And so, to follow the rules, we dutifully turned off our phones and stowed them away in our luggage and didn't look at them again. Of course, we don't have a DVD player in our car (and never ever ever will), so tv and media were out as well.

It was a beautiful, beautiful thing. No one could reach us. We couldn't reach anyone. We were forced to talk to *gasp* EACH OTHER. We were blessedly oblivious to whatever was happening in the outside world for 9 whole days. And isn't that what a true vacation should be? I plan to write a separate blog post on going tech-free when you are tech-addicted (as I am). Save up some energy to read that one.

Back to the topic at hand: Rainier. I realize that the word fun is overused so often, but it's true- Rainier was just so much FUN. We had nowhere to be and no one to be accountable to. Given those parameters, we did what we do best- were active, active, active and then relaxed, relaxed, relaxed, all within view of an amazing mountain. Honestly, neither of wanted to leave Rainier, but Stehekin was calling our name.

At the trailhead for the White River Glacier, Hazel decided that she needed a hiking stick. Fine, we said. Just don't impale yourself. She didn't. Goal for the day? Accomplished.

Hazel and I admire the view from Mt. Fremont. Huh, I thought to myself. Nothing around here is "small".

My peeps.

Look who showed up to meet me on Chinook Pass! Let's see...me going 9mph up the ridiculously long hill, her traveling 40mph in her car seat...I think she won.

Finally cresting the pass. Where is my cold drink? Now, on to Yakima.

Serene

2010-08-03T11:13:00.000-07:00

We returned from vacation late Sunday night significantly more tan, well-rested and infinitely more relaxed. Looking back, I laugh at myself saying "I want to go to Europe" when Barkernews asked where we should vacation this summer. Ultimately, what I wanted to do but didn't know it, was spend time with my two favorite companions and enjoy their company in beautiful places.

Mission accomplished.

I have much to tell you, starting with our adventures in Mt. Rainier National Park, but instead of writing one obnoxiously long blog post that will take you days to read, I will tell my tales in several blog posts over the next few days. Before then, though, let me offer you some highlights of our family trip:

1. Watching Hizz pick up a stick at the end of a hike (she is required to hike the last 1/10th of a mile or so of every hike- we call it "training"), declaring it her hiking stick and loudly telling us, "I go HIKING!"

2. Riding my bike over Chinook Pass

3. After a long drive and some very hot weather, sitting in the Columbia River and pouring water down each other's backs while we all giggled uncontrollably

4. Stehekin (this is a blog post in and of itself)

5. Hazel trying to sneak out of the tent at 11pm (to meet her boyfriend, I suppose)

6. Hanging out on a floatie on the Columbia River in 95 degree weather

After this past week, I resolutely believe that every nuclear family should take a family vacation by themselves every year. No grandparents, no friends, no hanger-onners- just them. We came back a more cohesive unit and more in love with each other than ever before.

See you tomorrow.

Oh Hiatus

2010-07-23T16:46:00.000-07:00

For my two readers out there (hi Mom and Dad!), Barkernews, The Hizz, and I are heading out for a 10-day vacation to the east side of Mt. Rainier, Leavenworth, Stehekin, and my parents' cabin. Not only are we going on family holiday (during which we spend time with family), we are going on a technology holiday (during which we do not spend time with technology).

It should be lovely. See you when I get back. Multiple blog posts will follow, I am sure of it.

Summer = BIKES

2010-07-22T16:26:00.000-07:00

If the calendar says June, July or August, you can bet that Barkernews and I are doing a lot of weeknight interval workouts in the form of bike racing. Now, don't you worry- this doesn't mean we happen to be proficient at bike racing. No sirree. Nope, it's just an indication that we're trying not to puke several nights a week.

And we love it.

Monday night racing starts in April with circuits around PIR. I did a couple of those this year and then the excitement fizzled out for me. It might have been the fact that it rained pretty much every single Monday until July. Or what seemed like a high number of crashes. It lost its appeal after two nights of riding around and around and around a car race track.

Luckily, Wednesday night Mt. Tabor racing starts in June. Mt. Tabor is an extinct volcano with a road to the top and the race consists of 6-7 laps on said road. It is not an easy race and my "pain face" is in play pretty much the entire time. Despite that, I love it. I love the atmosphere, the people, the picnic opportunities, watching the other races. I might die after cresting that stupid volcano 7 times, but at least I went out there and left everything on the course.

And then there is short track mountain bike racing. In my quest to try something different and new and to see what else was out there, I raced my mountain bike at Vernonia in June. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod it was so much fun. Indeed, I had so much fun, I vowed to come out for as much of the 7-week short track series in Portland as I could.

It. is. awesome. Sure, I have poor handling skills on a mountain bike. And I am kind of a wuss on the bigger features. But who cares? The whole thing is more fun than should be allowed when your heart rate is sitting 5000bpm.

So. Remember this? Yeah, I lied. I still like bike racing. I just had to insert the whole fun factor back in to it. Add lots of really cool people, some sunshine, and good times, and if we're being honest? Okay, love bike racing. For real.

Suffering mightily on the volcano:

I have zero pictures of myself at Portland short track, so enjoy this lovely one from Vernonia instead:

Trip number 5? 6? 7? this summer. I've kind of lost count.

2010-07-20T14:22:00.000-07:00

Barkernews and I could not resist a three-day weekend spent admiring Baby Eli, so we headed to Seattle to try and help out Nate and Marissa and smother Eli in kisses. Turns out that Nate and Marissa are Wonder Parents and they needed our help with just about...nothing. Seriously. I remember being in a very thick fog for a few weeks after Hazel was born and even though we got out every single day, I think I remember very little of it. These two? They are aliens. The look well-rested and were ready for a new adventure every day.

Have I mentioned that I hate them?

As Example A, I offer this picture, taken at the Seafair Indian Powwow in Discovery Park (which was, of course, their idea):

For clarification, I offer you this shot of Barkernews and I. As parents of a 2-year-old, we don't look nearly as good:

I have never been to a pow wow. The Native American ceremonies in New Mexico are very different and don't allow photographs. The Grand Entry gave me chills.

The Hizz was a bit of a terror this weekend. We are chalking it up to seriously cutting in to her predictable nap schedule and lots of attention being showered upon Baby Eli instead of her. It was definitely trying on me though, especially since she became extremely clingy to me. To lessen her impact on others, Barkernews and I took her on a ferry ride to Bainbridge Island. Barkernews LOVES LOVES LOVES boats. Hazel wasn't nearly as psyched. She decided to embark on some tantrums instead. Yikes.

She was calmer on the way back, mostly because Barkernews took her and I sat down and enjoyed the...ahhhh...silence.

Afterwards, everyone went to Sail Sandpoint, where Nate keeps his Laser. We all took a breather onshore and took turns riding in Nate's sailboat. It was so. much. fun. Haze was not interested in sailing. She was only interested in taking her shirt off and posing for the camera.

Then we came home and adored Eli. He is really, really cute. I am one proud aunt.

On Day 3, Hazel was no less tiresome, but she did let me hold Eli and offer to share her baby with him. Sort of. My thought? I could never have a 2-year-old and a newborn!

To cap off a spectacular weekend, we went to Luther Burbank Park on Lake Washington for a picnic. I rode around the island with Nate, Hazel and Barkernews played on the playground and Marissa and Eli relaxed. We met up at the swim beach, which is always Hazel and I's favorite place to go.

After such an awesome weekend, it was hard to point the car south and head home. Seattle is such a charmer when it's sunny and warm and Nate and Marissa are such welcoming, fun hosts. We'll be back again in August to steal that baby (and maybe just drop Haze off at Grandma and Grandpa's house and speed away without looking back?).

Hot High Desert

2010-07-14T15:28:00.000-07:00

A conversation between Barkernews and I, on the way home from Bend on Sunday:

Him: Why do we keep road racing if we suck so bad at it?

Me: Don't ask me. Maybe we just like to get our asses kicked on regular basis?

Him: Sheesh.

Me: You know what, though? I would rather DFL and have a hot wife (or in my case, husband) than come in top-10 and have a fat, ugly wife.

Him: True that.

So that about sums it up. We went to Bend to race the High Desert Omnium, which consists of a criterium, a time trial, and a road race. It was hot. It was painful. We all performed mediocrely (is that a word?). We will probably all be back next year because we are married to hot people and we like to get our asses kicked, though in no way are those two things related

Barkernews hanging on in the crit. Don't lose that wheel, Barker!

Doing my best not to let those lead girls out of my sight.

Hazel knows how to do her thing at bike races: Look cute and entertain others.

A little break between races: swimming in the Deschutes River. Ahhhhhhhhhh.

Barker family photo. How about we stay here and don't go back for the time trial?

The night view from The Rocking A, Craig and Katie's house which was so generously loaned to us while they were on vacation.

Those Ironclad guys are dangerous in a road race. Watch out for them.

All by my lonesome on the road race finish. The only word in my vocabulary at this point? OUCH.

MY NEPHEW!

2010-07-09T15:11:00.000-07:00

After our trips to Sunriver and Sunlands, did Haze and I do what normal people would do and go home, wash clothes, unpack and relax? Heck no, we didn't! My sister-in-law, Marissa, was going to have a kid any day now and I wanted to be there. Unlike the other three siblings in my family, I didn't get to be an aunt or uncle when Hazel was born. I got to be her mother, which is pretty awesome I suppose, minus the part where she starts screaming and I still have to deal with her. If you're an aunt, you get to give the kid back when the kid screams and that sounded like some kind of sweet deal to me.

Poor Marissa. By the time we made it to Seattle, she had been to the hospital twice already, convinced she was in the throes of labor. The hospital convinced her otherwise and sent her home. She was feeling frustrated and oh so ready for Dim Sum to come out. Waiting to have a kid puts you in some kind of weird head space and the hours can draaaaaaaggggggg onnnnnnnn.

Luckily, I have the best solution for such a problem: a toddler. Have you ever met my toddler? The preeminent word these days is MINE. MINE. MINE. Or, better yet: ME. ME. ME. So, I would say she's pretty good at distracting people. I put her in to action by handing her to Marissa and promptly taking off for an open water swim in Lake Washington.

Yes, I know I am a hero. You don't have to tell me.

Hazel did her job. Marissa was distracted. And then I pushed on her stomach and Dim Sum (oops, I mean Eli) conveniently came out on the day I was scheduled to drive home. I like this Eli kid already. Hazel? Well, she's still deciding.

Marissa doing her best to convince Eli to come out:

Upon seeing Eli, Hazel promptly started saying "CHEESE!" in hopes that all attention would be turned back to her. Sorry kid, you have been usurped.

A semi-family portrait (MIA: Ailey, Ritchie, Clayton, Barkernews, The Hizz):

Proud grandparents, two times over:

Hazel meets Eli up close and personal. Her response: Um, yeah. Can we go back to talking about me?

Celebrating the U.S. of A.

2010-07-07T14:35:00.000-07:00

Upon our return from Sunriver, I furiously washed clothes and re-packed in preparation for Hazel and I's trip to Mom and Dad's cabin in Sunlands for the 4th of July. Poor Barkernews was on call, so he couldn't come. Nate and Marissa were on baby watch. Ritchie was chillin' by himself and Clayton was working at camp in Wisconsin. That left the hard core 4th of July celebrators- Mom, Dad, Ailey, Hazel and myself- to live it up for everyone else.

Honestly? I wouldn't say we "lived it up". I mean, we're not 19 anymore (with the exception of Hazel who has yet to be 19). We did, however, partake in a justifiable amount of birthday celebrations for our dear country and relax a lot in the sun.

We began our festivities with the Sunlands kiddie parade. You haven't seen a kiddie parade until you've seen the Sunlands kiddie parade- kids on ATVs (sans helmets), kids on golf carts (sans adults), kids on large floats with swimming pools and water slides (no joke) and little 'ol Hazel in her wagon, dressed to kill.

Watching my dad fix the wagon and giving directions:

Pre-parade. Hazel wants to know where she can get one of those ATVs:

Well, we certainly didn't win any awards, but a good time was had by all and included fudgesicles and ribbons.

Next up on the weekend agenda was some boating. Original plans included water skiing, but the wind off the river was cold and the river was even colder. So we just drove around and stared at the wildlife:

On the actual 4th of July, Ailey and decided to get off our arses and run the Cherry Bomb Run in George, WA. There was only one small problem: we thought it was a 5K. It was actually a 10K.

Ouch.

We both ran anyway and we both finished with respectable times, but seriously, why isn't that run a 5K?

Of course, to reward ourselves, we watched the George parade and spent some time celebrating at their festival by eating BBQ, visiting the petting zoo and watching the Line Dancing Grannies. I can think of no better way to celebrate.

To finish the three-day weekend off, Haze and I headed straight for Seattle, hoping to see my niece or nephew. No dice. More to come.

Vacay

2010-07-01T14:55:00.000-07:00

I'll be honest. I used to think of Sunriver, OR with disdain. Sunriver is a vacation destination for families. And there aren't really a ton of views of the surrounding mountains. Barkernews and I really, really like views.

But Sunriver has grown on me in the three years I have been going there for the Pacific Crest Triathlon. It has grown on me so much that we planned a 6-day vacation there this year and then spent much of the 6 days turning to Barkernews and saying, "I love it here".

I love the smell of the high desert and the pine trees. I love the omnipresent sunshine and the hot temperatures. I love that I can ride the cruiser bike (thoughtfully provided by the rental house) around 33 miles of bike paths- to the store, to the pool, to the river. I love that out the back door are miles and miles of beautiful road, calling my bike, and miles and miles of trail, calling my mountain bike.

I really love the opportunities Sunriver provides for us to spend time as a family and to hang out with friends.

Can you tell it was an awesome vacation?

Witness the evidence:

Barkernews and Hazel (and Baby, of course) admire the sun and the river and the glorious feeling of not having to go to work.

Did I mention I did a little triathlon while I was there? Yep, the Pacific Crest Olympic distance race. I took 7 minutes off my 2009 time, 13th out of 46 in my age group. Next year, I shoot for under 3 hours. Pretty sure I can do it if I improve my run training. Maybe.

Did I mention the cruiser bikes? (Barkernews used his mountain bike since he needed a gear or two to pull the baby trailer.) Oh My God, I need one. Unfortunately, in my real life, I live at the bottom of a very steep hill so unless I move or get a cruiser bike with a motor, it's not happening.

I love vacation! That's Eli, Sara's 13-month-old, in the foreground. She's pretty dang cute.

Barkernews and I managed to sneak off for a little mountain biking fun on the Deschutes River, thanks to LeAnn's daughter, Sara. That was stupid fun. Seriously, it was a major highlight of my vacation for us to go out and ride together and a gorgeous, fun trail which was perfect for our abilities.

It was hot somewhere

2010-06-14T19:45:00.000-07:00

I love the Oregon coast. Really, I do. I just dislike a few things about our lovely coast here in Oregon. For one, I hate that you have to make a reservation to camp eons in advance, so you never know what the weather will be like. For another, I hate that it never seems to be warm there. (see: here and here and here.) Nevertheless, I refuse to give up on the beach. I mean, it has SAND and OCEAN and MOUNTAINS. It is a pretty cool place despite the fact that I can never win weather-wise.

I made reservations to camp at the beach when we decided to give those whole mountain bike racing thing a try in Vernonia. Never one to turn down an opportunity to spend the night away from home, I grabbed one of the last campsites available and smugly started making plans.

To my chagrin, it was the sunniest, warmest weekend in Portland of 2010.

Of course.

We tried to convince ourselves that it would be just as warm at the beach as it was in Portland.

HA HA. We are funny people. At least it was hot in Vernonia. It was one hot and muddy and sweaty bike race and I LOVED IT, all 45 minutes of it.

And I will be doing it again very, very soon.

The beach however? Not hot and sweaty. More like "brisk" and "windy" and "cold". To its credit, it was sunny on Saturday. Not so much on Sunday, when it rained. Bleh.

We made the best of it because we don't want Hizz to be a wuss like ourselves. We braved the wind and the cold and we played in the sand, damnit. For as long as we could stand it anyway.

On Sunday, my head apparently could not take one more drop of rain and proceeded to knock me in to submission by way of a splitting headache for the whole day. Barkernews kindly drove home and unpacked the trailer, all while entertaining Hizz. He's a good man, this one.

That night, I turned to Barkernews and said, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for dragging us to the beach when we had awesome weather in Portland. I'm sorry my ridiculous headache made me no fun on Sunday. I'm just sorry." And then he looked at me incredulously and said, "What the hell are you talking about? I had a GREAT weekend!"

Despite the disappointing weather, the obnoxious headache, and the mosquito attacks, I guess we did have a great weekend. Barkernews came in third in his race. We got to eat hamburgers and chat it up at the Lions Club cookout at the lake in Vernonia. (Want to make an elderly person's day? Bring a joyful toddler around. Mission accomplished.) Hazel covered herself in mud. We sat around a campfire. We devoured s'mores. We built castles in the sand. Barkernews and Haze walked the docks in Astoria. Upon arrival at home, Barkernews and Hazel still had enough time to ride their bike to the food carts for ice cream and then the playground.

So it wasn't perfect. But it was a great weekend.

A small water feature in Saturday's course.

All this mud makes me look pretty core.

Barkernews on his way to third place!

Haze covers herself in energy drink instead of posing for a family picture.

Wearing lots of clothes...in June, at the beach.

This is my yard

2010-06-10T13:25:00.000-07:00

Summer is ever so slowly starting to make its appearance around here and with it comes the tell-tale signs and smells: wafting bbqs, dogs and children playing in yards, couples gardening and doing yard work together. Every summer, I have a brief moment of regret for not being a caretaker of my own little slice of maintenance hell.

I get over it rather quickly.

The thing is, I have been outside since...well, all year actually. I am outside all year long, summer or no. And because of that, I don't have the time or energy to put in to the maintenance of a yard *shudder*. If a day ever comes when I can't spend my weekend playing because I have to mow a lawn, it's a pretty guaranteed bet that I will be in the state mental hospital soon thereafter.

Don't get me wrong- I really appreciate everyone else's yards. I love coming to your house, holding a cold drink and enjoying a bbq. I love appreciating your flowering plants and vegetable garden. I love chilling out around a backyard campfire. I count those moments among my favorite summer evenings. And I love that I have friends that are in to their yards and create works of art with mere seeds. That, to me, is amazing.

Not having a yard means that we must make a considerable effort to get Hazel outside to play. This has been the biggest benefit of all of not having a yard. We live across the street from a football field-size expanse of grass, bordered by a river filled with huge boats and access to a fishing dock. A 7-minute block away is a neighborhood playground, teeming with kids. Hazel rides her tricycle in front of her neighbors' houses. We may not be friends with all of them, but now they all know her.

I read an article once which found that suburban kids are actually significantly more isolated than their urban counterparts. It makes total sense to me- suburban kids can just escape to their own backyard. They always have to invite playmates. They never have to share if they don't want to. Mom and Dad can just send them out the door to play while they make dinner, instead of physically taking them outside.

Yes, we give up a sense of a security. We don't get to choose Hazel's every playmate. We must always accompany her. And, sometimes there is trash in our very public backyard. I admit, it's not always perfect. There are days I want to retreat to my own private deck in the sun and ignore the rest of the world.

But then I think of that whole "maintenance" issue and the 30 days I skied this year and the 15 bike races I have done and the several camping trips already this spring and, it's a pretty easy decision. I grab my keys and head over to a friend's perfectly green backyard.

A weekend in the life

2010-06-07T11:45:00.000-07:00

For the first time in 20 (20!) days, the sun came out, just in time for me to compete in the Blue Lake Sprint Triathlon. I am getting in to this sprint triathlon thing- you're done in time for brunch and you're not so physically wasted that you can't do anything else for the rest of the day. I love it. It's still pretty competitive and there are some wicked fast sprint triathletes out there. I am not wicked fast, but I can hold my own in a mediocre manner. I came in 7th out of 46 competitors in my age group on Saturday, but I was sorely disappointed in my run. My legs hurt and it took me a full minute longer than my 5K the previous week.

Before the race, Greg introduced me to the concept of "kill rate". This is the number of people you pass in a race. Kill rate on the bike? Very, very positive. Kill rate on the run? Disappointingly negative. Meh.

Greg and Sara, triathlon virgins no more. Addicted yet? I guess we will find out!

Michelle and I demonstrate our Specialized River City Cycling Team prowess. Actually, Michelle has a lot more than me. She won her age group in the duathlon!

After the race, we met Barknews and The Hizz for lunch and then promptly headed to the desert, where it was purported to be sunny and hot. It was. We parked ourselves next to the Deschutes River and spent hours throwing rocks in to the water with Hazel, reading and just chillaxin'. Best way to spend a Saturday afternoon ever.

On Sunday, we did a little exploration- of the White River Falls and the Gorge Discovery Center. Neither Barkernews nor I have really ever been to that part of the Deschutes River, nor White River Falls nor the Gorge Discovery Center (despite many days spent in The very sunny Dalles). We loved it and mused about how we tend to visit the same places over and over again because we, well, we love those places and hold them dear in our hearts. But we also desire exploration, even if it's not very far afield.

I competed in a triathlon, we explored the desert and we were home in time to unpack in 15 minutes, make dinner, take showers and go to bed by 9:30pm. Now THAT'S what you call a weekend.

This week brings a lot of activity to the Barker house: ski patrol meetings, Mt. Tabor racing (finally!), long runs in preparation for Pacific Crest, a re-introduction to mountain bike racing (how do I ride a mountain bike again?), and a camping trip to the beach. Other people may think it impossible to get away as much as we do and still make it through the week. I, on the other hand, NEED our weekend trips to rejuvenate me for the week. I need that time devoted to my husband and my daughter and yes, even to me. I need to see beautiful places and revel in the sunlight, and take the time to imagine that those moments can and will last forever. Our work weeks are not difficult and they are busy and full by deliberate choice. But our weekends? That's the core of this family's time together and I want to keep it that way as long as possible.

Hiatus

2010-06-01T19:16:00.000-07:00

I spent the week prior to Memorial Day weekend obsessively checking weather forecasts. Would it be sunny at the cabin in Central Washington? Would it be hot? What would I do if it rained there TOO? I couldn't take much more rain, especially over a weekend.

There was no need to worry. I think that Sunlands, WA enjoys some sort of special blessing from above. Sure, it may rain every now and then, but never for long and that sun? Oh, that sun feels so, so good.

We didn't have the 95-degree temps of Memorial Day 2009, but we did have 75 degrees and sun. Considering that I am now growing mold here in Portland, that was good enough for me. There was a lot of time spent outside, from hanging out on the grass to throwing rocks in the river to cycling to rock climbing. It was the hiatus from soggy Portland the Barker family needed.

Ritchie gamely kept Hazel occupied by stealing her toys while Barkernews and I escaped for a little bit of cycling the country roads.

Oh, I am so excited to be riding my bike in the sun.

Have I mentioned that we love it out there? We do. It's so freaking beautiful. I mean, check this out:

Yep, pretty awesome.

We also got some rock climbing in with Ailey and Ritchie. While Ailey and Ritchie played around on the rock, Barkernews and I managed to knock off 6 climbs in 3 hours, which must be some kind of record for us. I led some 5.10a and 5.10b climbs, which is the hardest I have done in...two years? It was total radness.

Seen from this angle, the future is so bright, the Barkers have to wear shades.

While we were off climbing, my family was busy letting Hazel wear her pajamas in the middle of the day and goof around in the wagon.

One of the great things about hanging out with so many family members is the ability to ask ten people at once, "So, can someone watch Hazel so Barkernews and I can go on a date?" and someone will invariably answer "YES!"

Off we went for our date to the very fancy restaurant at Cave B Winery. The view from there is even more amazing than the view from Mom and Dad's cabin. Nothing short of spectacular. The food is pretty good too, even if it does come in very small portions.

Price per bite? I don't even want to think about it.

After killing a bottle of wine with Barkernews at the restaurant I promptly put myself to bed because I had a triathlon in the morning. My bike racing season started in March, but triathlon season is just starting to heat up. I say that tongue in cheek of course- the lake water was a brisk 58 degrees. I had a much better swim than the week prior, I pushed it hard on the bike and I maintained a fairly steady pace on the run. I came in at 1:10 and 3rd in my age group. Considering the 1st and 2nd ladies were the winners of the whole race, I wasn't too upset. Oh yeah, and the winner of my age group put in a 22 minute 5K run. Definitely can't beat that one.

Post-race, about to head home for more family fun activities.

Post-race activities included a whole lot of chilling out and then a long drive home. Before leaving, we managed to get a Barker family picture, an extremely rare occurrence.

Someone here doesn't have very much hair...

We almost cried as we drove back in to the wall of clouds on the west side of the mountains. Does the rain REALLY have to continue?

Apparently it does because showers are forecast for the rest of the week. We are already circling the wagons and planning the next getaway- starting this Saturday, right after my triathlon in Troutdale. Plans are indefinite except for the following: The Barker family will be desperately seeking sun.

The things I promise myself

2010-05-26T11:49:00.000-07:00

I will only race the Mt. Tabor Circuit Race if it's not raining, I said. I will only ride out to Hagg Lake and do the open water swim if the weather is warm, I said.

I lie to myself.

I did it all anyway, in the rain. What else was I supposed to do? It is predicted to rain until the end of time around here. I have poison oak (a small price to pay for a weekend in the sun) and I am on steroids- a lot of them. The steroids make me crazy. The rain makes me depressed. I had no other choice.

The Mt. Tabor race, aka The Murderhorn, consists of 6 laps up and over the volcano. It is not a large volcano- total elevation gain on each lap is only 136.6 feet- but it gets pretty painful sometime around lap 3, at least if you're me and training has been minimal to nonexistent. I was beyond grateful to only race 6 laps- the senior men did THIRTY. I think I would have died of a heart attack before I could get to lap 10.

I kind of like to climb, being a small person and all, and I kind of like to descend now that I have a super rad race bike, so I have to secretly admit...I like Mt. Tabor. It hurts and I feel like I am surely going to gasp my last breath the whole entire time but, dare I say it? I enjoy it. Even in the rain. Lots and lots of stupid rain.

Then I went home and read a book while Hazel took a 2-hour nap. Bliss.

I had the same rule for my Sunday activities as I did for Saturday- no rain. I didn't follow it. I set off at 6:45am to ride the 37 miles to Hagg Lake with Michelle and THANK GOD she came along. Because, yeah, you guessed it, it rained. Riding with her made it so much more bearable and fun.

I barely made it to Hagg Lake in time to register, throw on my wetsuit and jump in to the freezing cold water before the 2000m swim started.

The whole event was horrific. There is a reason the swim is the first event in a triathlon- maybe because it is not advised to jump in to cold water when your heart rate is still sitting at 150bpm after a bike ride. I couldn't get my heart rate down to a manageable level and I panicked. I have always been a slow swimmer, but this was ridiculous. It took me a good 5 minutes floating on my back just to calm down enough to flip back over. Even then, my heart rate absolutely refused to go down. It was an awful catch-22- I couldn't speed up enough to warm up (my hands and feet felt like they were going to fall off) and I could never go slow enough to get my heart rate down.

Worst open water swim EVER.

Afterwards, a very worried Barkernews quickly escorted an almost hypothermic me to a heated vehicle where I had to stop shivering long enough just to put on dry clothes. My time was terrible, but I SO did not care. I just wanted to go home, be warm, and have a normal heart rate.

I made Barkernews ride home in the pouring rain and then I went home and laid on the couch for two whole hours. Hazel took a wicked long nap. I didn't feel the need to move, so I didn't.

Then I went to Happy Hour with Barkernews and Hazel because it was still raining and at some point in the deluge, what else are you going to do?

Next time, I will listen to myself and avoid open water swim when the temperature outside is below 75 degrees and I have just ridden 37 hard miles. For real.

I should just give up and move to Arizona

2010-05-18T20:29:00.000-07:00

The Barkers love to camp. It's in our blood or something. Most springs, summers, and autumns, you can find us in a tent or trailer, hanging out in a beautiful place. Unfortunately, for a multitude of reasons, we haven't camped once this spring.

It was a travesty of earthquake size proportions, so we promptly rectified the problem by packing everyone and everything up this past Friday and heading somewhere sunny and hot. We pointed ourselves in an easterly direction and landed at Memaloose State Park in the Columbia River Gorge. We are not normally state park campers- we generally prefer to not see any people, much less those who hang out in giant rvs with satellite dishes and big screen tvs, but Memaloose is just so ideally located, it's difficult to pass up. We went there last year for Mother's Day and we have fond memories. We are creatures of habit, what can we say?

Upon arrival, Hazel celebrated a return to camping by stripping off all of her clothes and running around naked. Who DOESN'T love to camp naked? Bravo, Hazel, for having the guts to do so!

Then, Hazel slept for 10 hours. This is a bigger deal than you may surmise. Hazel is an amazing sleeper, but she has recently developed this opinion thing. Her opinion is that if she happens to be traveling with her parents AND she gets to sleep in the same room, then she gets to play with them all night.

It seems that we have a difference of opinion.

Turns out that Hazel is actually smarter than we think. After explaining the concept of sleeping on the floor in the trailer and then setting up her bed, she quickly adopted all 2 square feet available to her as "MINE!" and curled up in her cozy sleeping bag and fell asleep.

Thus far, this is the only time that "MINE!" has worked in our favor. Adult beverages were later enjoyed by the campfire while the toddler snored away.

Last year, we attempted a hike up to Tom McCall Point above the Gorge, but gale-force winds scared us away. This year, the winds were calm and Hazel weighed about 15 more pounds. I am not really sure which is more torturous.

Barkernews gamely carried the increasingly heavier Hazel while huffing and puffing up the 1000 vertical feet. I bounded ahead and kept worrying that he was going to have a heart attack. It was all worth it. The views at Tom McCall Point are truly spectacular and the top is a very kid-friendly meadow filled with wildflowers. Also, I wore a tank top, as evidenced by this picture. Not only that, but I was hot. That was so awesome.

After a quick descent and some sandwiches, we headed to Mosier for a fast bike ride to Hood River. Once again, I lucked out and did not have to deal with Hazel weight. I rode my super light, super fast race bike. Barkernews did not. He rode his commuter bike, fenders and all, and towed Hazel in the trailer. I had fun beating him up all the climbs and pretending that we were in a team time trial. Barkernews had fun? Yeah, I'm not sure.

Why did we ride to Hood River? For ice cream, of course! We promptly rode back to camp and filled Hazel with more sugar- her first s'more. She liked it and asked for more. Or was she asking for a s'more? Or maybe more s'more? Sometimes I make mistakes in my toddler translations.

On Sunday, Joe and Ky showed up and we went rock climbing! In the desert! And it was hot! I keenly noticed that it happened to be raining in Portland. I laughed.

We had never been to Horsethief Butte before and wow, it is a cool place. The climbing is great, despite the reality of having to set top ropes, and the scenery is spectacular. In addition, there is no one there. MY FAVORITE KIND OF PLACE.

We topped off our day with-what else?- more ice cream and then drove through a rain storm back to Portland. Or, I heard that there was a rain storm. How would I know? I was fast asleep.

I am now sunburned, scratched up, overdosed on sugar, and tired. It was the kind of weekend I looked forward to for weeks and one I will remember for a long time to come. For me, nothing can outdo camping with my family in the desert sun, doing all of our favorite activities (yes, ice cream is a hobby). I can honestly say that I faced Monday with a sense of dread. The weather was gray and rainy, the work day seemed unnecessarily long, and my two favorite people did not get to come out and play with me in the sun.

I am already dreaming of our next weekend as desert rats. Only 10 days until Memorial Day and counting.

Spoketacular

2010-05-13T20:46:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was designated as Barker Family Fun Weekend. Since February, our weekends have been booked and while we loved every one of them, we haven't had the opportunity to just hang out as the three of us. Plus, we had a Ski Patrol banquet on Saturday night that precluded any major travel plans.

The sun came out. And, seriously, if that was all that had happened, that alone would have made Barker Family Fun Weekend a success. Score one for the Barker family.

We made "meh" plans to register The Hizzle in her first bike race ever- the Kiddie Kilo at the Eric Kautzky Memorial Track Race. As it turned out, we showed up too late and missed out. But we did get to see some track racing and bike friends and Hizz wore her bike helmet all morning. Score two points for the Barker family!

We all came home and *shocker* went on a bike ride. Since PIR last week, I have done ZERO training rides, but I have gone on several rides with my family. As everyone else in the bike racing universe goes on century rides and does sweaty intervals at 6am, I am...well, I am decidedly NOT doing those things.

Racing performance will undoubtedly suffer. Life satisfaction will not because, really. Have you ever ridden your bike next to the toddler featured above? Enough said.

Everyone concluded Barker Family Fun Weekend Part I at the Ski Patrol banquet at Timberline Lodge where we all stayed up too late and clapped too loudly. And then we drove home at an ungodly hour. I think it was 11pm.

The next day, in case you live in a cave, was Mother's Day. Seeing as I am a mother, I got to do whatever I wanted. What I really wanted was to do was go to Hawaii, but I am constrained by this budget thing. It is such a bore. As a completely worthwhile alternative, I wanted to go on a food cart tour of Portland by bike. It was almost as good as Hawaii.

If you happen to live outside the Portland bubble, the food cart thing is big around here. So big it has its own website. I won't explain it because the website does a much better job. The plan was to hit up three food cart pods and a couple parks. We only made it to two pods because we ate too dang much.

Oops.

We did, however, get a whopping 15 miles in and I took a nap. Three points for the Barker family!

I have a lot to talk about like seeing Isabel Allende speak and consequently wanting to marry her, forcing Barkernews to take up track racing, rumblings on the job front (good ones, not to worry), and my own future in bike racing (your guess is as good as mine), and big camping plans this coming weekend, but it's 9pm and that means this Cinderella is about to turn in to a pumpkin.

Until the next Barker Family Fun Weekend which starts in approximately 20 hours and counting...

KILL! KILL! KILL!

2010-05-07T21:42:00.001-07:00

Photo courtesy of Pat Malach, Oregon Cycling Action

Why this picture is funny:

I was, *ahem* popped off of the main group at the Monday PIR race. The likes of Tina Brubaker and Heather VanValkenburg showed up. I don't have a dog in that fight.
I was in a chase group.
I normally wear contacts.
WOW, definitely not the most attractive face I have ever made.
This photo appeared with an online article highlighting the wins made on Monday night by the aforementioned Heather V. and Christian Tresser, NOT an article about poor, untrained female bike racers who suffer when they ride in circles on a car race track.
Did I mention that I was popped?
Hel-LO furrowed brows!

I should show this photo to my students. They might be even more afraid of me than they already are. GRRRRR!!

Welcome to Oregon, it's wet and cold here.

2010-05-04T21:13:00.000-07:00

Even in May. You know, when it's supposed to be at least 60 degrees? Yeah, it's still wet and cold in May, so wet and cold that you want to buy that $1000 same day ticket to Hawaii before you go insane.

My in-laws came last weekend. Predictably, it was ridiculously wet and cold. So much for "beautiful Oregon". We went outside anyway and the whole time, I wanted to scream obscenities at the sun. I didn't. I drank my coffee and only complained a little.

Well, okay, fine. I complained A LOT. But I think it was justified. I mean, it's FREAKING MAY! C'mon, Oregon, throw me a bone!

A bright spot amidst the crappy weather: Hazel's first gun! And it's pink even! So, how old does she have to be to shoot a gun again? Two? Two and a half?

If you hike to Upper Horsetail Falls on a rainy day, it will be just as wet underneath this waterfall as it is outside this waterfall. I have done the research. I know.

Apparently, Haze is a Tough Mountain Girl and I am not, because she didn't even want to put on her rain jacket.

Oh, hey look! It's still May and I am still wearing a coat!

The sun made some very brief appearances on Sunday. I took off my coat, put it back on, took it off, put it back on, took it off- you get the idea. The clouds won.

Hizz and her grandparents. They all adore each other. When Barkernews and I would stop to wait for them on the hike, Hazel would yell from her backpack, "POPPY! POPPY! POPPY!" until they showed up.

We ended our weekend on a dry note and took advantage of the lack of rain to hit up a local urban climbing area which shall remain unnamed. Joe graced us with his presence and Hazel explored all things railroad. Everyone still had to wear long sleeves.

One day, spring will come.

Not to fear, there wasn't an actual train in sight. There were, however, a whole lot of "CHOO CHOO" sounds coming from a certain toddler.

A little bit of leading on typical, west-of-the-Cascades, dirty rock.